It depends on the social situations. In my experience (yay, anecdotes) you only need to assert your preferences once or twice (maybe less with soft drinks, maybe more with alcohol, depending on the situation and people involved).

Anyway. You shouldn't be surprised if people react incredulously when you're not just deviating from the social norm but opting out of entire categories. "I only drink water" is no different in that regard than "I'm a vegan" or "I only eat raw food". It's a perfectly fine preference, but you're going to be an exception and exceptions tend to stand out.

I'm German but don't like beer and feel rather dispassionate about football (or "soccer" to Americans). It used to take some explaining when I was younger (i.e. teens and early 20s) but at 30 I find that barely anyone[0] cares about it -- simply because they've learned that they don't have to agree with everyone about everything to be friends.

[0]: Except die-hard football fans who can't imagine anyone not at least enjoying the sport or uber-machos who think drinking beer is a requirement for being a man. But those traits tend to be obnoxious enough on their own.

Another anecdotal experience: zero of my friends drink soda at all. We're all in the US in our late 20s. It's definitely a cultural thing, because we're all different kinds of people with different diets, different weights, etc. No one is diabetic.

On the other hand, 100% of us drink alcohol, and so far the only people I've met who are my age, from the US, and don't drink are recovering alcoholics and people whom I've later discovered are extremely anxious and worried about the possibility of feeling "out of control" (which is a totally valid reason not to drink).

> You shouldn't be surprised if people react incredulously when you're not just deviating from the social norm but opting out of entire categories

People react that way because they take your statement as a moral judgement.

And they have a negative reaction because they have cognitive dissonance with what is presented to them. They're forced to either reject the alternate moral judgement and be hostile to it (in some sense, not directly), or accept it and change their behavior.

Even subjective "preferences" such as "I like soft-drinks" have logical consequences, or implicit decisions associated with them. I.e. "I am fine with hurting my long-term health because I enjoy the immediate rush of soft-drinks." Not every can live their lives in a completely evidence-based, logically-optimized way.

Hey, I am not German, but I live in Munich. I hear what you are saying, I am Italian, so try not caring about football there, it's tough - people accept it, but it makes small talk very difficult sometimes.

On alcohol and drinks in general, even at 30, I think people still care, especially the ones you meet for the first time. Simply put, not drinking alcohol may signal a bad past (alcoholism), or being a potential nut job (diet nazy or gym pumper on steroids). This is actually useful information in social interactions, so I do understand why it is so widely used. On the other end, being vegan is so much accepted and so common and fashionable right now that the signal you get out of it is rather poor, so it's used less to pre-select or to make quick judgments.

>On alcohol and drinks in general, even at 30, I think people still care, especially the ones you meet for the first time. Simply put, not drinking alcohol may signal a bad past (alcoholism), or being a potential nut job (diet nazy or gym pumper on steroids). This is actually useful information in social interactions, so I do understand why it is so widely used.

You say useful and understandable, I say shitty and judgmental.

I don't know - I'm italian as well and I never had any particular problems with not liking football. Although I may be somewhat of a special case, as I seem to associate with people who don't care particularly for the sport.

By the way, how are you finding life in Munich as an Italian? I've been thinking about moving after I complete my degree, so I'm quite interested to see what other people's experiences are in that regard.

Hey, fantastic and best experience so far in Munich and I have lived in other 6 different cities so far. Said that, Munich can feel a little bit dull sometimes, but if you get a good circle of friends you'll have a great time, especially if you are into outdoors. Feel free to shoot me an email if you have more questions.

>> Simply put, not drinking alcohol may signal a bad past (alcoholism), or being a potential nut job (diet nazy or gym pumper on steroids)

I'd sure appreciate it if you didn't spread that hateful FUD in this setting. There's quite a wide range between sedentary and 'gym pumper on steroids', please be respectful to those who choose to occupy a different place on that continuum than you.

>Now, that's the logic, and it's a sound logic

Some people like the taste of soda or the effects of alcohol. That's the logic, and it trumps the fact that "useless" calories are being consumed. We aren't rational automatons.

My solution for when I don't feel like drinking. Fizzy water with a lime in it, people assume its a vodka tonic.

This is the same as a friend of mine. He drink Cranberry juice. It's too strong to just drink, so you sip it. Because of that, it makes it seem like you have drink on you.

Or people could just stop being so nosey and judgemental. Option 1 is easier though.

Yep, lime and soda is common in UK pubs for people who don't want alcohol but also don't want a sugar overdose.

To clarify a little bit - 'soda' in the UK refers only to fizzy water / 'club soda' - i.e. unsweetened.

(this isn't the case in the US, where it can refer to pretty much any canned sweetened drink - Coca Cola / Sprite / Dr Pepper / etc)

Thanks. I've long wondered what soda actually is!

Sparkling water?

That seems like a really good idea, might try it next time

This has been my go-to for years.

i used to think the same way, but you'd be surprised how quickly people accept that you don't drink (soda or alcohol). and if you're continuously getting harassed for it it's a sign you should shed those people as quickly as sugar.

Agreed. It's a subconscious power test by members of a group. Once they decide that you are stronger than them then they will leave it alone - and respect you for sticking with your principles. If they don't then, yeah, the group is toxic.

I don't drink soda, and I've never had anyone comment.

Regarding alcohol: I kind of understand the skepticism about people who don't drink. Drinking usually puts you in a more honest, less controlled, and less guarded condition, which makes drinking with other people almost a trust exercise. Not drinking at a pub is kind of like bringing your sword into a gathering where everyone else agreed to leave theirs' at the door.

That's an excellent analogy. My wife doesn't drink, but we had some of my friends over for board games and some beers. By the end of the night she was quite annoyed and none of us could figure out why. She was annoyed that they were making jokes at my expense. She was mad that I was making jokes at their expense. She thought it was rude. Imagine being in a less trusted social situation than "wife and best friends", maybe a business meeting, where the client wasn't drinking but everyone else was. It's easy to see why there would be a social stigma against the one person who wasn't drinking, just like there would be a stigma against the one person who was if the shoe was on the other foot.

That's an interesting explanation. But I believe it is primarily a group behavior thing. When someone doesn't behave like everybody else, it raises suspicion or can even be seen as offensive.

I'm not drinking for over 6 years just because I can't see pleasure in alcohol intoxication.

All these comments like "you're not respecting social norms" feel kind of offensive. And now this sword straw man.

Sorry, but not drinking simply makes me not drunk. I'm never "more honest" and "less guarded" when I'm drunk (that's why I don't like it - I fight the drunk state of mind every time).

Anecdotally, I don't know anybody under the age of 30 that regularly drinks soft drinks anymore. They aren't terribly good and they are about the worst thing you can put into your body—a can of coke has more than 40gs of sugar.

Alcohol might be a tough one to kick. It's so intertwined with social life I don't see it going away anytime soon.

I live & work in an urban area with young people. Hardly any of us drink soft drinks. When I return home to visit my family (small midwestern town) everybody drinks soda all the time. Most shoppers have a couple of cases of soda in their shopping cart at the grocery. My parents and siblings have 2nd refrigerators loaded with soft drinks. Every meal out includes them.

I think it would be easy to think that soft drinks are going out of style if you're living in a tech bubble (like I probably am), but when you get outside of this circle you can see the massive amount of soft drinks that are still being consumed.

Coke's and Pepsi's marketing has actually responded to that trend - rather than try to win non-drinkers, they try to get current drinkers to buy more.

Obviously, the second part of that strategy is to create a range of products to cater to the kids like us not drinking their syrup.

The largest quantity of beverage stocked at my company's developer office is standard Coca Cola. It's the younger people whom I see grabbing those rather than the diet sodas.

My experience with soda is the same. Once my friends and I stopped drinking it, it actually becomes pretty disgusting to have something with that much sugar in it.

Among college educated folks, you'll probably not see so many sugar soft drink drinkers, but among the poor they still consume them.

>a can of coke has more than 40gs of sugar.

A can of Coke has 33g of sugar.

And here we learn that:

(1) a can of coke varies in volume based on different places in the world. 330 ml in europe, 355 ml in north america.

(2) Sweetness of a can of coke varies by country. 10.6g sugar per 100ml in France, 11g sugar per 100ml in USA, 12g sugar per 100ml in Canada.

A canadian can of coke is 355ml and 42g of sugar, per the label printed on it.

A uk can of coke is 330ml and 35g of sugar.

It depends on the amount of CocaCola in the can, and the formula for that particular distribution.

Eg. USA has a 12oz can with 39 grams of sugar. UK has a 330ml can with 35 grams of sugar. (They aren't required to provide more precise accounting and so that 35 or 39 are rounded figures). These are close to the same.

Of course, if one is using 'coke' generically, there are many that have more than 40 grams. A 12oz can of A&W root beer is at 46 grams, as is a 12oz Mountain Dew.

Why not then just standardize, or at least attempt to, the method by which we compare sugar-content in these discussions.

I.e. "4 grams of sugar per 100ml of coke"

From a health standpoint its like arguing the relative merits of 3 packs a day of smoking vs 3.1415 packs a day, "eh".

Also unit dosage for virtually all consumers is the unfortunately somewhat variable can.

Yeah... back in the day, us kids would try to find the soda with the highest cane sugar content. Now, I try to find the lowest net carbs in everything I eat or drink. Arguing about 33g vs 40g in a soda does seem non-productive.

Europeans buying a coke can in the US will not stop at the 330ml point. They are gonna continue drinking until the can is finished.

39 g is far more representative of the overwhelmingly likely sugar consumption in the US than any per ml measure, and far more useful when discussing diets.

No, in the US it's ~40g. It might be different in other countries or with cane sugar instead of HFCS.

sounds like the social situation needs to change, not the explanation.

assuming you're in your 20s now... don't worry, by age 35 there's less explaining and less criticizing.

To expand upon this, typically, people at that age have learned moderation or are teetotalers due to choice or recovery. Not a lot of binge drinking woo-boys/girls in their mid to late 30s and beyond, and the exceptions to that rule are probably faced with some societal judgement. The alcoholics (more so the ones in denial) and the one-off regular drinkers that scoff at teetotalers are probably the only judgement giving ones.

I was probably getting close to alcoholism myself and felt touchy around people that didn't drink (well, only the ones that announced it every chance they got, but then it feels like a judgement not a statement). I drank every day basically (and not ONE beer either), but when I went to moderate myself it wasn't too difficult; now I drink less than a handful of times a month.

Standard XKCD: https://xkcd.com/1534/

I have a colleague who completely avoids alcohol. No particular reason for it other than one day he decided to do it because his friend wanted to do it. His friend didn't keep it up, but he did for ~30 years now. I have nothing for or against alcohol and I like some drinks now and then (mostly avoid beers, just don't like the taste).

I have to respect this guy that he keeps it up so long, even though he has nothing to gain or lose from it. I would have figured at least one day, what the heck, it's not a big deal, not doing anything bad or anything. But he decided he won't drink, so he doesn't. Mad respect.

I've heard of people avoiding alcohol after a positive (A;G) or (G;G) test for http://www.snpedia.com/index.php/Rs1799971.

>go explain that to people every time you are drinking water in a pub

Why do you feel a need to explain it? I've never had any reaction at all with 'no thanks, I'm good'. You don't have to say 'I'm on a diet' 'I don't drink' 'that crap will kill you' or anything else. Just no thanks. If someone does ask about your water, say 'I'm taking it easy' or 'I'm good'. Or get a club soda and lime.

Successfully explaining things gets people to shut up. I've never been able to say 'no thanks, I'm good' without there being follow up questions.

Another side of this, is that if you buy/drink sugary beverages a lot outside of those social situations, you're also likely to get criticized about this. Every other peer tries to remind how unhealthy coke is, how one can clean rust with it and so on. And this is not out of health concerns, but just the same case of social situation conformance stereotypes - one's expected to drink while partying, but don't they dare to do the same alone at home.

And when some people start bringing up Coke's supposed rust-cleaning properties, others start bringing up Snopes and other contrary evidence.

Right now, there's too much "health noise" surrounding sodas, because they make so much money and so many people like them. We can't get a good "health signal" to "health noise" ratio to tell if these have healthy and/or unhealthy outcomes when we drink them. And so many of us just avoid them.

Alcohol is a social lubricant which, yes, we shouldn't rely upon. But there are a great many things we should do that we don't - I don't see alcohol as a huge problem in that regard (unless, you know, it becomes a huge problem for you personally).

I also have friends who don't drink, including some when I was at university (a high time for most people's blood alcohol levels) - few people cared. Though my one suggestion to you is to drink something other than water, even if it's just club soda. Aside from anything else, getting something that costs money will likely make the pub staff friendlier.

My excuse, when I decide I need one is "I'm just not feeling like I want to drink today." If anyone tries to put the thumb screws on me (which only occasionally happens), I say "I've never folded in front of peer pressure before, it's unlikely I'm going to fold today. I don't feel like drinking today." Usually that's enough to get people to drop the subject. If they still continue to the point that I've had enough, I leave. If my friends can't respect my decisions without fighting me on it, I don't want to be around them. They'll have way more fun getting drunk without me anyway, so I'll leave them to it and see them another day when either I do feel like a drink or they don't feel the need to coerce me into drinking against my will.

> One thing with the beverages is that if you choose to not drink them, you will most likely be the weird one in most social situations.

Why are you so preoccupied with what people think about you?

Just get a glass of water. If they ask, say you don't drink. That will be the end of it. Trust me, you're not the only one. Many people don't drink soda/alcohol/etc.

> go explain that to people every time you are drinking water in a pub

That's like going to a whorehouse and saying you're abstinent. Of course people are going to give you weird looks.

Don't go to establishments that primarily serve alcohol. If you're going out with friends or co-workers, go to a establishment where the primary focus is on food. Then get yourself a glass of water.

Most people hate making decisions, including where to go. So speak up and tell them where to go.

I am not the type that moves around easily in social situations, so I try to remove things that put me on the spot. Said that, I still don't drink alcohol or sugary stuff, it's just annoying to explain why every time

I leave in Munich, Oktober Fest... a small beer here is 0.5L and you have biergartens everywhere. You definitely can push to go to restaurants or cafes, but the reality is just that many times you'll find yourself in an establishment that serves primarily alcohol.

You can go out only to sport, music, outdoor events. But then you'll hardly meet the same number of people and you'll restrict yourself to certain specific group where average is usually above 40.

I have moved to Coke Zero, which tastes just fine (although it somewhat depends on the country where you buy it). I don't think there is much wrong with that, so I don't quite understand why Coca-Cola doesn't promote it more instead of denying that sugar may be a problem.

They promote them to the people who like them, but lots of us just do not like the taste of any diet soda. Coke zero and others are better than traditional diet coke to me, but I've never got beyond the initial bad taste--I'd much rather drink water than them.

I've heard that you eventually get used to them or even prefer them, but I've never gotten to that point.

I don't like diet coke either, but think that Zero is completely different. Make sure you drink it when it's cold. My impression is that it also depends on the type of artificial sweetener used, which depends on local taste and regulation. I think it tastes good in Europe and most parts of Asia.

I drink primarily Zero, I switched to it at the same time I ditched sugar in favour of artificial sweeteners (I tried to drink tea without any sweetening but gave up after few weeks, I just can't stand it). It's wonderful where I live (Poland), and I grew to like it even more than plain Cola. I've also seen numerous attempts to promote Zero over the original flavour; one time they even gave away cans of Zero disguised as ordinary Coke to make a point (you had to remove the can from a cardboard overlay it was in to discover it's Zero). I don't know how successful were those campaigns though.

It's funny because I think Zero (and original) taste absolutely disgusting and make me feel sick within minutes of drinking them. But I do have a severe weakness for diet coke (aspartame). I've mostly eradicated diet coke over the last year and now I just drink water or black coffee. Water wasn't so hard a transition really, but developing a taste for black coffee took a few months of dedication.

I understand that you like it, but I do not.

That's the other extreme. I usually mix normal coke (too much sugar) and diet coke (not enough sugar) to get a more balanced experience.

There used to be Pepsi Edge that was half sugar and half splenda (probably high fructose corn syrup) but it was discontinued for some reason one year after introduction in 2005... there is now Pepsi Next but I think that it is 70% high fructose corn syrup

Even sugar-free sodas are still acidic enough to be extremely bad for your teeth in the long run.

Because they replace sugar with aspartam, and it's at least as bad as sugar (at the very least in the public opinion / medias).

> and it's at least as bad as sugar (at the very least in the public opinion / medias).

Shrugs, public opinion and media's opinion is just that opinion not fact so is (to me..yay my opinion) irrelevant.

Nothing is safe in huge amounts but I'll take aspartame over sugar as the risk of diabetes is known.

http://www.nhs.uk/livewell/goodfood/pages/the-truth-about-as...

I agree with you about the general opinion. However I do believe it is relevant to your first question which was why Coca Cola does not promote on it more, I don't think you want to advertise on doing something people dislike or think it's bad (be it true or not it does not matter at all).

On the other hand I think most people know drinking Cola is not good for your health.

There is no evidence that consuming a small amount of aspartame (less than 30 cans of diet soda a day) is harmful to you.

I stopped drinking alcohol a while ago for several reasons, an increased exercise regimen being one of them (though not the most important one). Now when people "ask" I just say I'm an athlete (which has become more true since then), gets them off my back pretty quick.

Apparently being healthy is frowned upon for anyone who doesn't need it (semi-)professionally.

This is so true. I went to a University in the UK which is well known for sport, so I was friends with a few aspiring pro athletes. They were the only people I recall being given a 'pass' when it came to peer-pressuring people to drink. The UK, on the whole, has a really awful relationship with alcohol, especially among uni students.

I stopped drinking alcohol completely about 5 years ago. I was drinking a lot of pop everyday and couldn't figure out why I couldn't lose weight. I was still playing soccer four times a week and working out at the gym the other day. I had changed my diet pretty drastically and still no major weight loss.

Then I started cutting back on pop so as not to experience caffeine withdrawal. Within a few weeks, I was down to one can a day. After two months, I lost 10 pounds, almost all because I stopped drinking so much pop.

It's pretty amazing how many calories and sugar pop has and how negatively it affects your body.

you can pretend that you are a recovering alcoholic and that you are using your tremendous willpower to stay away from alcohol, even in a bar. People might applaud and respect you for it and leave you alone :p

Just ask for a white dolphin on the rocks (water over ice) :)

It is all about the glass shape, most people will assume you are having vodka soda.

there is nothing wrong with drinking alcohol in small quantities every day - red wine can prevent all sorts of diseases - most of the world drinks a beer or two on a daily basis.

drinking coke and pepsi contains no health or nutritional benefits - you ideally dont drink them ever (drink water or at least the diet version)

The trouble with the no-soda rule is, at a restaurant at lunchtime you're pretty much down to water, tea and lemonade. You can get pretty sick of that. Especially if you don't drink caffeine (because of blood pressure issues) so its water or lemonade.

I've innovated - ask for lemonade cut with soda water. Fizzy lemonade!

What's wrong with seeming like you are a recovering alcoholic? Many people are, and if someone judges you for that, they're not a good person. Many people also don't want the excess calories, and if someone judges you for NOT joining them in drinking alcohol, again, they're not a good person.

Same goes if they think you're a food/diet nazi. Who cares? It's your body. They shouldn't be so judgmental of your life choices, especially something as personal as how you decide to fuel your body and stay alive. And if they are judging you, in my experience, it's usually because they're working through their own issues and would rather it not be pointed out how unhealthy their choices are, and they want you to join them in their maybe-not-so-great decisions.

>One thing with the beverages is that if you choose to not drink them, you will most likely be the weird one in most social situations. Especially if you cut on alcohol.

Totally disagree, nobody cares if you have 2 beers vs 8 beers.

I agree. I went to college with a housemate who didn't drink. You'd be surprised how few people cared/noticed that he did this. I think one of those things where if you're the one not drinking you think you stick out more than you do.

Unsweetened ice tea is a great flavorfull beverage with no calories and caffeine...

I was zero alcohol for years and every single time I said "no thanks, I don't drink", it generated incredulous faces and multiple questions about whether it was a health / religious / whatever thing.

Admittedly, this is "Boozy Britain" though.

It's he 'I don't drink' part that causes this. If you just left it at 'no thanks, I'm good' you wouldn't get the same reaction.

The 'I don't drink' part comes across to insecure people as judgemental or superior, so drop it.

Like when people ask you if you have a lighter. "Sorry, I don't," goes a lot farther than "No, I don't smoke."

They're not asking you for your convictions regarding alcohol / tobacco, they're asking you if want some / have a lighter they can use.

But people don't tend to say "Why don't you have a lighter?" when you say "Sorry, I don't." in the same way that they query why you don't want a drink. I endured this for years; it gets tedious after a while.

That happens to you? Never happens to me. Either case.

At any rate, you can answer why when they ask you why.

No, you'd get "You don't want a drink? Why not?" as I experienced many times. Hence the clarification.

Lots of people care. I regularly go to a sports bar that features beers around the world. The guys in my group love to peruse the beer app that the bar sponsors. I order water and eat only the healthier items on the menu.

Despite their love of beer, I think that my health consciousness weighs on them... makes them feel a little guilty. Consequently, they make little comments about my lack of drinking. Harmless stuff, but my guess is that they're actually expressing disappointment in themselves.

I especially notice that when new people are with the group, the core members feel that they have to point out and explain that I only order water. So there's obviously some tension and discomfort there.

Your parent is saying you don't have to drink as much beer as everyone else to fit in just fine. You can nurse one beer for a couple hours, if you pick one that tastes OK warm.

Or maybe camaraderie? If you only drank Guinness, maybe they'd point that out too?

Even two is pushing it for me these days.

The industry really should adapt. I've been drinking this "Pure Leaf" Peach sweetened tea that has almost half the calories of the Lemon tea, and I don't think has artificial sweeters. It tastes really good, I don't even notice it doesn't have the same amount of calories.

Right around when I got this, "Gold Peak" appeared in the supermarkets and that is so sweet it is sickening.

Companies are pure capitalistic enterprises that respond to market demand right? Right?

But there's a physiological "high" of getting the sugar fix in soda, which makes the brain desire it. It's nowhere near the strength of addiction produced by hard drugs. But it is still significant and I would guess it does impact sales.

Just like apps are designed to be "engaging", ie. trigger the brain patterns where it will desire to return to the app, sodas are very much the same.

Companies are pure capitalistic enterprises that respond to market demand right? Right

You can imagine if meth or other addictive drugs were legal thst they would be in our drinks (which is the exact history of Coke). Modern food engineering is about maximizing consumption, even at the detriment of those consuming.

>Now, that's the logic, and it's a sound logic, go explain that to people every time you are drinking water in a pub and they go: "ehm, uh, you don't drink?". Which, by the way, if not explained properly can seem like you are a recovering alcoholic

I find it amazing that people think asking why you don't drink is acceptable, no one stops drinking for fun.

You can just say you don't like the taste.

I've had that reaction on occasion. More often lately, however, I get a look of shame and the response, "I wish I didn't drink". I suspect people probably do not need a whole lot more prompting than "have you really never regretted getting drunk?" to realize your choice is wise.

You can always say that you're the designated driver, which at some bars will get you, ironically, free soda.

What do you do if you don't like the taste of water? Fruit juice is pretty high in sugar as well.

Personally I've become a big fan of tea. Hot and iced. In my opinion most teas don't require any sugar or require very little to offset a bit of bitterness. 9 times out of 10 I use no sugar at all. And that 1 time I do it's maybe half a teaspoon because the tea in question has a bit of bitterness or because I let it sit for too long.

Tea also has the added benefit that if you make it per glass it forces you to get away from the computer for a few minutes. Plus the aromas and flavors are, in my opinion, more numerous and pleasant than all the sugary drinks out there combined. Tends to be noticeably cheaper too :)

Seconded. If you live in a metropolitan area, you will likely have a Teavana or other chain/mom & pop tea store where you can go in and smell or try all of their varieties.

You'll easily find half a dozen different teas you like ranging from the classic black teas to exotic varieties that taste like supermarket sugar drinks (like strawberry lemonade - one of my favorites at teavana). The latter usually require less a 5g bump of sugar to bring them to the level of retail drinks.

Learn to like it. It's water for pete's sake. Vital for life.

I take GT without G. (Gin-tonic but no gin). Often the bartender laughs at this a bit and gives it for free.

Tea.

Have you been to many pubs? :-)

We're living in an alcoholic beverage renaissance.

Try a craft beer or have a glass of wine.

A drink a day is good for you anyway.

idk about bars, but here's a tip for house parties: finish a beer bottle, and keep refilling it with water thereafter.

>>go explain that to people every time you are drinking water in a pub

Don't go to pub.

Pub: A public house where beverages, primarily alcoholic, may be bought and consumed.

But then you have a different issue: no friends, because everyone wants to go to the pub. Being the guy who will only hang out with you if you agree to his demands is not, socially speaking, a winning strategy.

That strikes to me as a fair compromise: we'll go to a place I don't like. I won't make a single comment on it, and in fact I'll be cheerful and happy, but in return you won't ask me to do the thing I don't like.

"no friends, because everyone wants to go to the pub"

I went thru that back when I was young (once you have a herd of kids, you won't have time for adult socializing, so that kind of solves itself).

Anyway at least for an introverted young guy, I got way more than enough socializing at the gym (get drunk while lifting hundreds of pound weights, what could possibly go wrong LOL?) and hiking club (open container laws are enforced in our parks, maybe not all countries). I also met people at non-credit night classes while learning some carpentry, Japanese, cooking, religion, philosophy, history, whatever looked cool I'd sign up for ... I would imagine its much easier for young people now with online event organization for meetups and conferences and maker spaces.

I wonder how much people drink at maker spaces. I would imagine drunken table saw and metal working machine operators don't live very long. They seem to produce things and the injury rate seems low, so probably not very much.

Things get complicated if you're in one of those situations where friends work and socialize together. Super awkward, will never go back to that again. "Never cross the streams" - Ghostbusters

There was a time when tolerating second-hand smoke, if not smoking itself, was considered necessary evil for socializing.

There was a time before that, where smoking was only allowed in 'smoking rooms' while wearing a 'smoking jacket', so that ordinary people didn't have to smell like a campfire half their lives.

Not if you have friends that don't go to the pub! It's not unheard of.

You got downvoted for some reason, but you still have a point.

If one doesn't fancy drinking and if situation allows for this (i.e. they have a voice while discussing where to gather, not just invited to pre-agreed place) - at least they should suggest their friends to gather somewhere else. Some place that's not about drinking.

That is, if the place is still a subject of discussion, "Aw, guys, you know I'm not fond of drinking - how about some other place? I know a good cafe nearby..." is certainly not awkward.

And, well, sometimes it's not a bad option to decline sometimes, too. Depends on a particular company.