I've had experiences that I enjoyed every minute of (for example because they were new, or doing things that I love). Periods of hard work that stand out in my memory because of how much I learnt, accomplished, felt the 'flow' state. And time spent with people I'm close to that deepened those relationships and gave me a huge sense of connection.
For me, being conscious of what I invest my time in is less about the category of experience, and more about generating opportunities for high quality experiences, making sure I don't pass them up, and being present in the moment during them. I'm not great at this, but it's what I try for.
Happiness and fulfillment are both choices.
Otjerwise where does it end? You start worrying about the purpose of your legacy since what does it matter anyway the sun will explode, swallow the earth whole, and eventually the whole universe will go through heat death.
Hence my issue with this: If you need to use (1) "life is meaningless" as a stepping stone to (2) "therefore, life has whatever meaning you give it", you've already agreed to that constraint by default. I'm sure it helps a lot of people get from (1) to (2), but better still is to realize (2) is in a sense _deeper_ than (1) and you can just throw out (1) once you have (2) locked down enough in your psyche.
That's not the same as life having no meaning, just not an inherent one. A fireplace is not inherently burning, but if you stack a bunch of logs in there and light it, it will burn all the same. The meaning of life is just the same. The physical reality of it is at it is, but what you do with it is up to you. You can follow the path laid out before you, like lighting the fireplace, but nothing's stopping you from grabbing a knife and running off to the woods to run with the wolves if that's what you'd rather do. Nothing but yourself, anyway.
But you're still finding meaning in the abyss - you're choosing what to live for.
Which is great!
Most people can't get there. They stare into the abyss, and run screaming back to some false comfort.
I stop asking questions once I am satisfied I understand something, not before. Sometimes I'll leave a question for later, to give my brain some time to digest it, but besides that, I'm always working through something or other. Just gotta ask the right questions is all.
Maybe Hedonism is sound.
The type of shit I write in a journal is not the type of stuff I want people to read. It is internally processing and organizing thoughts and private matters. It is shower thoughts all the way through processing relationships and emotions. My family, for instance, doesn't need to know half-thought out things that would offend them. Maybe later those journal entries would help me with a difficult conversation with them or serve as a jumping point for a "real" article or post. Most are just private.
I write emails to my young kids and will share them with them once they are older.
I guess I’m a nostalgic.
Further you're trying to disguise a chicken-and-egg paradox as some deep insight.
> if we can function from a state of feeling content as we live each day .. then what we do during the lifespan given to us matters little
Why do you think people desire meaning in the first place?
"Nothing matters, just be content" is a poor substitute for the things you call a futile endeavor.
Kind of nihilist.
Or at least a little bit.
But i don't think nihilism itself looks deep into the "be content" part, but way more in the "nothing matters" which is not the point of the article.
Existencialism and Absurdism in the other hand, seems like a "better label" for it imho.
So, if I am acting from a state of fulfillment or contentment, what I choose to do with my life might be quite different from what I would do if I felt unfilled and lonely.
The opposite is called Eudomonia
I think a life full of connection is generally better than one with no connection. I'll even go so far is if anyone response to this saying they're better off with no connection they're lying because the fact that they wrote a response at all suggests they're trying to connect. I'm not saying HN = connection but writing to people in forums is reaching for connection.
I also don't agree contentment is the end of it. I know of every few people who claim being content is best who would give up their partner or be just as happy without them.
I agree. The older I get, the more important they become. And I say this as a person who is generally comfortable alone.
Of course not every connection is deep, but that doesn't make them any less meaningful.
You're spot on about teaching/influencing others, and you don't have to be an actual teacher. Just giving advice and/or helping others when asked (and sometimes when not) is a bigger deal than I think many realize.
This isn’t true
almost everyone has some kind of long term connection with other people because we meet so many people in our modern lives.
but chances of "them being reciprocated in the manner we value, or of them lasting when we need it" are extremely low.
Many people don't even have a good relationship with their families or with their parents or with their kids.
It is also closely linked to aging.
The older we get, the fewer friends we have. According to a recent study by experts from Aalto University in Finland and the University of Oxford in England, our social network shrinks after we reach our mid-20s.
this is specific to Americans
https://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/c_fit,f_au...
I recently came across a term for this. Telic vs. atelic activities [0]. Telic activities are things with some terminal state, e.g. a typical goal-oriented project, or something like the act of getting married.
Atelic activities are those activities where the continuous process is the goal. Certain types of learning, being a good parent, and so on.
The important thing to realize is that in most cases it's not the activity itself that defines whether it's atelic or telic, it's how we approach it. You can make "traveling the world" a very goal-oriented activity with a checklist that you must get through, or you can approach it as a continous lifelong project where the enjoyment is in figuring it out as you go.
I believe this distinction is also important for work. Making something telic, e.g. with an agile process, comes with the danger of taking the day-to-day enjoyment out of an activity such as programming that you would normally enjoy. Of course there must be some amount of planning, but I think we've pushed too far into the goal-oriented direction that makes people miserable.
> Atelic activities are those activities where the continuous process is the goal. Certain types of learning, being a good parent, and so on.
Reading the article, I understand this differently. Telic activities are indeed activities that have a terminal goal. However, the idea of a continuous process being the goal seems orthogonal to the telic/atelic distinction. You can have an activity that is both enjoyable and has a final goal: one can play a video-game both because they want to beat it and because they enjoy playing it. An activity being telic doesn't mean it's not enjoyable by itself. You can also have atelic activities that don't have any goals.
There's no reason, a priori, that making an activity telic should take away from the day-to-day enjoyment. Having a final goal shouldn't stop people from enjoying the journey. It does change the game (from an open-ended sandbox to a more linear game), but it doesn't make it unenjoyable per se. What really takes out the enjoyment of the process is not the introduction of the goal, but rather an excessive optimization toward a goal at the expense of the process.
I'll always remember this.
Live a life of atelic enjoyment.
Pleasure is also consistent but less so: eating an applie pie is pleasurable. Maybe not two days in a row though.
Satisfaction is much less certain and reliable. Something might be satisfying today but not next week.
Hanging out with friends. Satisfying. We laugh. Then it gets less satisfying. We still laugh. But no satisfaction.
Mental state matters here. A cut stings, but I've been cut and not noticed.
> Pleasure is also consistent but less so: eating an applie pie is pleasurable. Maybe not two days in a row though.
I think some forms of pleasure stem from novelty. "Variety is the spice of life" and all that.
Depends on the dream and the experience. I can recall many dreams and many experiences in breathtaking clarity as if they were actual photos. Compared to photos, these also carry sentiment, meaning and they have impact.
After I was enlightened, I chopped wood and carried water.
Yet, it is worth asking, what makes for a meaning life? What makes the 4000 weeks worth it? For some, they chase wealth, power, career success, get one's name recognized, etc - these are milestones to be achieved. Things to accomplish.
Others will say, such accomplishments are not the purpose, let us accumulate as many meaningful experiences as possible. So do things like travel the world, and so on.
But it is worth reflecting, a few years from now, what really is the difference between a dream you had a few days ago, compared with an experience from, say 10 years ago? The difference is very little. Our memories are fuzzy, and to chase experiences will also likely leave us feeling unfulfilled.
Human relationships are also similarly shallow, even if we seek social connection, the odds of it being reciprocated in the manner we value, or of it lasting when we need it, is low.
So what's my point? The point is, whatever pursuits we undertake with the belief out there that something that I accomplish, accumulate or experience will bring me happiness and fulfillment is a futile endeavor.
Instead, if we can function from a state of feeling content as we live each day, whatever the circumstances, then what we do during the lifespan given to us matters little. However long or short, the inner contentment makes it meaningful.
Sorry for the long response, but wanted to share how I look upon this topic.