Not directly related to the habit formation part, but this reminded me of something my dad used to tell us as kids about flossing and brushing teeth when we'd complain about it:
Dad: You know, you don't have to floss and brush them all.
Us (amazedly): Really?
Dad: Nope, just the ones you want to keep.
https://www.amazon.com/Tiny-Habits-Changes-Change-Everything...
I wrote some educational apps for language learning. Are there techniques that I could use to help and motivate my users?
Motivation is a fickle beast that ought never to be counted on.
If you want Fogg's take in a nutshell, here's a short podcast interview: https://boxofcrayons.com/2016/08/bj-fogg-on-behaviour-change... . tl;dl: Have an explicit trigger that you can't ignore.
Was this because you hated it so much that you couldn't bring yourself to do more than one at a time, or is it important to effective habit building that you intentionall hold yourself back? (I can't imagine getting as far as remembering to do it, getting out the floss, tearing off a piece, flossing one tooth and then not saying, eh, I'm already here, might as well do more.)
For me, that was the key development. Up to that point, I hadn't understood that the goal is to scrape plaque off the teeth, and had only been flossing to get food out from between my teeth. Once I understood that, flossing became much easier, not to mention, after a couple of weeks of reduced gun inflammation, more comfortable.
It was a dental hygienist who explained it to me, not a dentist... I think for dentists, there may be a bit of a conflict of interest.
It went from this very unpleasant finger tourniquets and hands inside my mouth to doing it one handed while I read or watch a clip online.
I floss semi-regularly but will go periods of time without flossing due to the annoyance factor. I will try these. Just looked them up and are decently cheap.
My dentist recommended those, works like a charm for me. Although keep in mind they're thicker than dental floss, meaning they may not fit between certain pairs of teeth if they're very close together.
Other thing he recommends is “practicing” your habit, especially if your context changes e.g. you’re staying in a hotel for a week. This would mean for example to mimic brushing your teeth in front of the mirror then walking to the bed to sit and close your eyes 5 times or so.
To start it’s probably worth picking something up that you can easily prompt yourself to do (such as a note on your mirror). The only one that failed for me was posture related which relied on a too-irregular prompt.
What a wonderful mental model. Thank you for that phrasing.
My tendency, and I think most people's tendency around me, is to discuss stress in terms of how to limit it.
Taking it on changes my relationship to it (at least in my mind). Taking it on, gives me control over it.
I highly recommend everyone buys his new Tiny Habits book and gives the program a try.
(I'm unaffiliated)
Thanks so much for the book recommendation and the pointer towards BJ Fogg.
Easily the Tiny Habits habit formation regime created by Stanford researcher BJ Fogg. A lot of the addictive design patterns you see in apps like Snapchat, Instagram, etc. are built off his research. Quite nefarious use of psychology for advertising/“engagement”, but the plus side is you can use the same strategies to build habits you want to build.
Step 1: Consider the habit you want to build, e.g. “I want to meditate 10 minutes every day”
Step 2: Make it the absolute smallest possible version of itself; so small that it requires zero motivation/willpower, e.g. “I want to close my eyes and take 3 deep breaths every day”
Step 3: Place this habit immediately following an existing habit, e.g. “After I brush my teeth in the morning, I will close my eyes and take 3 deep breaths”
Step 4: Do this activity, and after each time you do it, reward yourself with a small celebration. It sounds ridiculous but I literally just say “Victory!” and force a smile on my face. The small rush of good-feeling-chemicals will keep you coming back.
I’ve used this method to pick up daily meditation, journaling, and flossing (acquired simultaneously!) after years of struggling to pick up any one of them. The first two habits have been monumental in my ability to learn, take on stress, and improve virtually every one of my relationships.
A shameless plug for BJ because he’s a great guy: his book, Tiny Habits, happened to be released today (what a coincidence!). I haven’t read it but if this is remotely interesting to you, I’m sure it’ll be extremely useful and engaging. It’s on Amazon, you can find it!
Sidenotes:
* Don’t worry about the habit scale down, it will naturally grow over time into its fuller form. I spent a month of the year just flossing 1 tooth each night (ridiculous, I know!), then 5 months just flossing 1 row (better!)
* Part of the trick is finding a good habit to put your new habit after. You probably already have a lot more habits than you know, since the whole point of a habit is to be automatic.