Brilliant. Every time someone asks me whether they should go to Harvard or MIT, I'll send them this link instead of my usual rant.

Moral of the game:

Connections trump everything. Talent means nothing. With seven billion people on this planet, what you can do means nothing. Your access to capital is all that matters. Making capital is insanely hard. Convincing others to give it to you is much easier. PG went to Harvard. Zuck went to Harvard. Gates went to Harvard. Go to Harvard. Don't drop out of high school, and don't listen to people who've only gone to Harvard.

Spoiler alert

A would be game professional is born.

Background You drop out of highschool. You have enough social skills to make people think you are in the know when you are in the not. Your 'art' gives programmer's art a new, ugly, meaning Know that publisher? No? Well I do, he's my uncle.

Job Results You manage to convince your uncle that playing golf all day is a real job. Congratulations, you run a publishing house! Pay: $2,000,000 a year!

I think this is the crux of the game—some commentary on the advantages of life given your connections, status, and social skills which one is born into.

You know what the best part about the game industry is? Leaving it.

And you know what the best part about leaving the game industry is? Writing a long open-letter blog post explaining why you're leaving the game industry. Plus follow-up posts responding to other game developers.

It's like owning a boat. The best days of a game developer's life are the day they enter the industry and the day they leave.

I've heard the best thing with boats is to rent one. That way you get a first day, a middle day, and a last day, then you give the boat back and go home.

Maybe you could intern briefly in the game industry and have the same experience?

"If it flies, floats or fucks - rent it." That's the saying.

Also, I wouldn't recommend anyone join the game industry for any period of time. I've never been in it, but I know 7-8 developers and they're all usually miserable and stressed out. Not only that, they make about 60% of what I make and they have no equity or reasonable vacation schedule.

It seems to be a very rollercoastery industry, where one moment people love what you made and then hate it the next. If you're a developer, you're basically a tool to implement the nonsense game designers come up with and your project manager is a cross between Gordon Ramsay and Tim Gunn. It sounds like a nightmare.

Intuitively, I chose two for connections and one for social skills. The results are exactly as expected, great:

"You drop out of highschool. You have enough social skills to make people think you are in the know when you are in the not. Your 'art' gives programmer's art a new, ugly, meaning Know that publisher? No? Well I do, he's my uncle.

Job Results You manage to convince your uncle that playing golf all day is a real job. Congratulations, you run a publishing house! Pay: $2,000,000 a year!"

Lots of people play games and think "I'd love to make games!" Well guess what... every kid who loves games thought that.

The problem with game dev is the same as Hollywood, professional music, and popular pro athletics, namely that there are waaaaaay more people who aspire to it than there are jobs. As a result, there's an extreme hockey stick distribution for success and a lot of exploitative labor practices like unpaid internships, long hours, unusually low pay, etc.

Connections seem to count for more in narrowly gated fields too. It probably has something to do with the number of top insiders being close to the Dunbar number, causing them to form a close-knit insular club of mutual back-scratchers. All the insiders know all the other insiders. Not an insider? Go home.

As a programmer working in games. I am afraid that what you say about getting into being hard without connections just isn't true. It is something I see written about a lot. The truth is that if you are a good programmer, comfortable working in C++ and can work in a team you will have no problem getting a job in games, connections or not. In fact, that is how most people I know in games got into games, myself included.

There are problems of exploitation of the workers but this isnt through people scared of getting work, I think everyone with a few years in the games industry knows they have the skills that would help them get another programming job without too much hassle. The problem is that people are passionate and that is being exploited in some places. The trick is find the good games companies and stand your ground on salary and working hours, admittedly this is probably easier in the UK than the US.

I worked in the games industry for 15+ years. It was a roller coaster of extreme highs and extreme lows: Getting my game painted on the side of Japanese bullet trains, succesfully pitching a game to a Hollywood film director, partying at an embassy in Germany, getting seriously alcohol poisoned, meeting with and shaking hands with Miyamoto and other childhood heroes, writing an email that got a French producer fired, having games succeed beyond anything imagined and having other games crash and burn hard. Now I am older and prefer a non-roller coaster lifestyle. But hey when you are young and full of beans, what is there to loose? That's the time to risk things. Just don't be naive about it.

Soon as we fix the sexism in the games industry we will have more women working in it

A would be game professional is born.

Background You are highly intelligent and decide to study programming. You have enough social skills to make people think you are in the know when you are in the not. Your 'art' gives programmer's art a new, ugly, meaning You're a nobody as far as the game industry is concerned.

Job Results You were smart enough to pass the programming tests, and did great in your interview. They hire you as a programmer! Pay: $60,000 a year!

60k starting salary as a coder?

Where can I apply?

The salary numbers are all tongue in cheek, although its pretty common for entry level game industry programmers to make $60K or less. For comparison the producer makes $100K, which is way above the average producer salary (~$75K) and almost twice entry level producer salary.

You have to take into account where the game industry jobs are, too. I work across the highway from id, and around here I wouldn't be shocked to find out entry level programmers make $60k/year. It's low, but not unreasonable considering the glut of people who seem to want in to the industry.

I don't have any concrete numbers, but I can say with reasonable certainty that 60k/year is standard entry-level income at a couple large studios.

I started at $72,000 and that seemed pretty common.

This is probably a decade old based on the source code.

Crunch time all year round baby!

Amen, brother! (Or did I just hear a great big woosh blowing past my head?)

Oh man oh man...

It's kinda sad that you have to use all 3 points, when creating a character in my own image I only ended up using 2 (or even 1, now that I think about it) points.

Put 1 for social, and 2 for connections to run the place :D

This is just a cynic view of game industry (and the world). Of course some people get a lot more that they deserve. But I have seen a lot of great professionals getting promoted thanks to their abilities and hard work. The world is not so black and white like this game. If you don't like it remember it and when you have a management role fight injustices and congratulate the people that deserve it.

I'm surprised no one posted about the "2 artistic + 1 intelligence = $0" outcome yet :)

Also 2 social + 1 artistic = "You draw nice concept drawings which your friends like. However, none of them will pay you for it."

The pop-up with the result just shows a blank screen until I double-click it. (Chrome 35 on Mac)

Job Results You impressed them by reporting a bug on their website. They hire you as a quality assurance analyst! Pay: $45,000 a year!

I was confused why you'd use a popup in this case, then I looked at the source and realized this has to be at least a decade old.

<SCRIPT LANGUAGE="JavaScript">

Indeed!

It mentions everquest multiple times so this must be ancient.

Oh that's great. It wanted me just $20k :) intelligence + artistic + connections

2 intelligence + 1 social = blank popup

Job Results You were smart enough to pass the programming tests, and did great in your interview. They hire you as a programmer! Pay: $60,000 a year!

This is a pretty realistic simulation