1. sit down somewhere, a relatively quiet and dark place is nice but you can do it wherever, maybe set a timer, maybe don't

2. close your eyes, pay attention to your breath

3. when thoughts appear in your mind, note them but attempt to keep your attention on your breath, not on your thoughts

4. when you notice that your thoughts have wandered away from your breath, congratulate yourself for noticing this, and go back to step 2

important: do not berate yourself for getting caught up in your thoughts, do not worry that your head is too full of thoughts to ever be able to "stop thinking" - your brain has been thinking for most of your entire waking life and disengaging from this is hard at first! it gets easier.

"the mind illuminated" is a nice book on the subject IMHO.

For those who need a structured intro, for me it was through mastering buoyancy control in SCUBA diving [1]. You’re watching and controlling your breathing and multiple environmental variables. Once you’ve felt what that’s like it’s much easier to recreate it on land.

[1] https://www.tdisdi.com/sdi/get-certified/advanced-buoyancy/

That’s a solid introduction to the most well know type of meditation but the specifics can vary quite a bit and people disagree on the specifics. Many groups consider meditation in a religious context though that’s far from universal. There’s also many ideas around what you should be doing while meditating from simply being in the moment to reflective thoughts.

Still meditation is basically get enough sleep then get in a comfortable position sitting, lying down, or even standing just so long as you can hold it indefinitely and focus on something for long periods. Breathing is always available but options vary wildly from something specific like smoke from a stick of incense, to the environment such as trees blowing in the wind, ripples in a stream, or even the sound of someone leading a meditation. Though in general people follow something similar to what egypturnash mentioned.

Moving meditation allows for some representative action like walking, dance, ritualized prayer, juggling, or even some repetitive factory job where you can do it indefinitely without thinking. Just be careful it’s easy to lose focus on what you’re doing so don’t try this when driving etc.

Some see meditation as a means of contemplation, in that you focus on a single topic to focus on while sitting. Please consult you local Buddhist/Zen temple for a Dharma talk or Koan as an example.

But others feel that can be restrictive in that it doesn't go into a deeper state. But that goes to the whole truth of zen and the misleading of the student and the one thinking they need to be there - it gets complicated.

Mind Illuminated is what finally got me into (a more stable) meditation practice.

Back when I used "The Relaxation Response" I believe. Taught myself in 7th grade.

- Go some place with no distractions.

- Lay down, and let your muscles go limp.

- Close your eyes, and just focus on your breath. In through the nose, out through the mouth, nice and slowly. I'd often hold at full breath for a few seconds just to let everything settle.. this is not a hurry.

- Focus on relaxing your toes, then your feet, ankles, calves, etc up through your chest, now focus on your arms... let all the stress run out your fingers like rays. Finally focus on your head, and push the stress out through the top of your head, or fingers, which ever feels easier. I'll also push stress through my toes too. The key is to release the stress from your body and visualize it... visualize getting rid of the knots and stress.

Some days, you'll get up to your calves, some days with practice you can get your whole body. But even your toes is an accomplishment!

- Your body will tell you when you are done. It is hard to explain, but you will know, "I'm done." When you are, don't rush to sit up, let your body rest a moment eyes closed, then open your eyes, wait a moment, then sit up. (if you were actually well relaxed this may stop a faint.)

But much of this comes from listening to your body. The noise of life isn't what matters... just listening to your body, and helping it relax....

I use relaxation, as a way to force other things out. So if work comes up, out it goes. Relaxation gives me a central focus, which helps with the whole experience.

That seems to be what all the meditation people say. I've done it many times, and it goes like this:

Ok, lie down. Relax muscles, sinking down, good breathe...

Bored.

Bored bored bored OMG this is so boring!

Breathe, breathe, try not to think of how boring this is!

Bored bored bored oh a bird is chirping. Chirp chirp chirp and gone.

Bored bored bored bored bored holy shit when does this end?

My fingers are flicking now. Bored bored bored bored fuck it I'm done. Waste of an hour.

My friend: wasn't that awesome?

Uhh.. let's just go build something.

I know, right? You've tried harder than me. I don't think I've tried more than a few times and probably didn't crack 15 minutes! I can clear my thoughts of everything except how bored I am and how long a minute feels with this level of boredom.

Love how well you articulate these notions. They are truly valid for most of us. It also means you're doing it right. The point then is to stay with the practice until you can stop fighting the notion of boredom and instead be "friends" with it. Just be fine with the boredom. Learn to relax in it. Hope you'll try it again.

As someone who taught meditation, this is very common. It’s kind of being like addicted to action (to put it bluntly , sorry for that)

Boredom is just one perspective of the mind. For you it might be more beneficial to approach meditation in other ways before sitting still or lie down. For example : when I do indoor climbing I almost get into this meditative state where only the next step matters. Some friends report surfing does this for them.

Observation is the key word, or experience of mind as it goes through different processes (say boredom, sleep, happiness, concentration, building something)

And of course no one ever says this. It's always presented as a "if you do it the right way, and do it enough, then it just works", which is definitely bullshit and even starts to trigger my cult response.

After a month and a half of intensive study that made no difference whatsoever, I'm pretty much done. The marginal benefits don't at all seem worth the extreme effort.

Now I just write instead. It's far more relaxing.

This is absolutely fine, I think of the hundreds of people I taught, I would say 5-10% simply didn’t not catch on at all, no matter my angle of teaching. In those cases I would focus on relaxation above all, like you already gathered yourself.

That said the different pathways to the experience you would call deep meditation is very diverse, and sometimes it’s also a phase/station of life people need to be in. In old texts these things are often described as different temperaments, so I doubt it’s a new thing :D

What is the boredom response? As in what do you think is telling you that you're bored?

Being bored isn't something you are necessarily. It's not a state, it's not something like anger, or fear, it's not a physiological thing.

Some people might find closing their eyes and focusing on breathing to be a bit intense. In that case you could try:

2. Relax and just be in the room.

4. When you notice that your thoughts have wandered congratulate yourself for noticing this and come back to the room.

Guided Meditations are a good place to start!

The Smiling Mind app is excellent.

I'm sure there are plenty of Podcasts and YouTube guided meditations to be had as well!

I’ve had a great experience with The Mind Illuminated[0] which I discovered a couple years ago… via an HN recommendation!

Depending on your preferences you may want to ignore some of the more religious/spiritual parts in it.

Either way, it has had a big, positive, and lasting influence on my life (even though I haven’t been meditating much lately anymore).

[0]: https://a.co/d/08L5nc8t

+1 for that book but it's a bit rough for a start I think. I'd try headspace, calm or any of the free guided meditations on YouTube for a bit before diving into that book. And yes the book reads quite spiritual despite the author being also a neurologist I think so it might not be for everyone.

I highly recommend "With Each And Every Breath": https://www.dhammatalks.org/books/WithEachAndEveryBreath/Con...

Also, the "Waking Up" app, which has a fantastic collection of guided meditations, dharma talks, theory, etc.

"The Mind Illuminated" is a really good book too, with a very specific (and effective) technique taught in a lot of detail.

There are lots of meditation apps out there, but most monetize with a subscription plan before you can access any meaningful amounts of content.

Recently I found an app with a pretty large following called "Insight Timer" that has a spectacular free library. It has single-handedly helped me build a habit after only meditating once or twice in guided settings.

Yeah but we're talking about < $10 for a month of content (on the one meditation app I checked).

The problem is not that one useful app demands <$10.

The problem is that for some reason "everyone" down to creators of alarm clock apps think subscription is the right monetization model.

Many of us are tired.

Please note that I personally at least am not against usage based: tokens are fine with me.

It is the stress of having to remember to unsubscribe (or feeling like a fool when I realize an unused app has been siphoning off money from my account for months) that bugs me.

yeah that sucks. My workaround for that is that privacy.com lets me give each new thing its own credit card number, and their service lets me say that credit card number can only ever be charged $10, so then even if I do forget to cancel, they can't charge me more money.

That, and sometimes you can cancel as soon as you start but still have access for the month.

I would advise to not start on your own and seek a teacher. A book is not a great medium to learn it.

While self taught can work for some people, for most it does not work out. A big thing on self meditation is that it means you do not have a mediator/moderator.

Possibility of ending up on the path to 'Zen-sickness'

https://tricycle.org/magazine/meditation-sickness/

The biggest hurdle is the preconceptions we have about meditation, and the cultural image we carry.

People will try to "be calm", "be zen", they will attempt to "empty their mind". They will look for something special. They will not understand the implications of frustration, impatience, discomfort...

It's very hard by yourself because you bring with you a lot of ideas from a world that doesn't meditate, but certainly has a lot of things they want to claim about meditation no matter how little experience with it they have.

And you won't know when you got in a direction that will not work for you

If you don't mind spending money, waking up has been pretty good so far, or you can try out the beginner course during the free trial to see if it fits you, I started meditation when I first watched headspace series on Netflix, it was world changing for me, remember, it's an exercise, it's not about meditating for a long period each time but gradually build up the habit of meditating, hope you enjoy the benefits and the journey of this!

ps. if you think the app is helpful, don't rush into the subscription, check out its scholarship

Try a float tank (sensory depravation tank). IMO it's like easy mode for meditating and I've thoroughly enjoyed it.

A lot of great answers here, and I would add the book "10% Happier" to the list. There is also a worthwhile companion app, but I prefer Insight Timer for an app.

I highly recommend this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2yEorY8UH30&list=PL5B1627ADA...

It's a systematic, well structured and holistic approach. No commercial background. Just teaching. Follow these simple 8 steps. Don't use an app.