With small kids it gets interesting, weekends aren't "time off" anymore in the sense of being able to follow adult pursuits, constant distraction and day begins at 6am and goes to evening or more if there are wake ups.

The work day at my full time job is the only real thinking time I have right now. I try a bit harder now to make that meaningful and interesting.

If I can't find a way to convince myself that the time I'm spending at work is part of a "life well lived" then I need to look for a new job.

You described my situation precisely. Weekends are long and chaotic when you have small children (and I've got three with the oldest being 5). Mondays are a return to normalcy - they go to day care and I go to work. And like you said, if work isn't satisfying, I have to find something new because work becomes my escape.

I find that getting up really early in the morning to work on the things I want to, then switching off from that to spend the morning with the kids works well. Being really consistent with it every day has led me to complete a few of the projects and learning tasks I've been working on.

At least then when I go to work I'm already satisfied.

For some people I imagine that night time would work best instead.

This. I do the same and this works best for me.

Can you specify what you mean by “early”? 5am? And when do you go to bed?

4:30am works best for me. I go to bed between 9 and 9:30pm almost every night. Occasionally it'll be later due to some event or catching up with people after which I'll still get up at 4:30am but it makes me significantly more tired. It's quick to fix though, I just go to bed even earlier the following night, around 8:15-8:30 does it best.

I know these times won't work for a lot of people but if you have young kids it's awesome. They're asleep anyway and working at night tends to ruin sleep for me so I just go to bed! Then the next morning I can work in peace without it disrupting my body so much.

Now that you have kids you need to make money in order to keep them fed, clothed, and (if you live in the USA) ensure they donpt go to a shithouse school.

Find meaningful work if you can get it. But prioritize money first. At least until the revolution comes and a living can be provided for all.

> At least until the revolution comes and a living can be provided for all.

Unless revolution comes and things go the other way.

>At least until the revolution comes and a living can be provided for all.

At least until revolution comes and you become a slave that must provide for all or else.

Or you get killed. Tech workers aren't exactly liked by the people calling for revolutions these days.

Or forget about money and move out of the US.

I have a bad news for you : we need money to live in other countries too.

I found that this starts to change as the kids get older. Mine are 8 and 11. They become a lot more independent and it frees up 15 minutes here and there.

Then do them first?

The truly prolific creative people I know do that work at non-traditional times if they have a full time job. Practicing music late at night, painting at 6am, etc. Even scheduling their creative work during low points in their work day.

I am also not good at this, so take this advice as an observation rather than a personal experience.

This is an exercise in "managing your energy, not your time".

For me the first several hours of the day are my most productive/creative, so I carve out at least a couple of those for my personal projects. Lately that's meant getting up early (5:30-ish) and prioritizing my own work ahead of my employer's.

I have found this to be effective, the problem for me is getting into the routine. When it worked, I got up earlier in the morning and was able to devote 1-2 hours to personal projects, 3-4 mornings per week. At some point, the habit gets interrupted and it's been tough for me to get back into it.

I’d have to wake up at 4am to do this. Young children and time to build stuff are just fundamentally incompatible.

So we just have to make do with the 7.5 hours at work.

I have 3 kids and get up at 4:30am every day to work on my own stuff. From 7am they're awake so I spend time getting them ready for school, etc. Then I go to work. Over the years I've found that getting this going consistently is the key. Even if you only get one good hour in each morning it builds up to quite a lot of satisfying work very quickly.

It did take a few years to become consistent though.

What time do you go to bed?

Usually 9-9:30 pm. Sometimes I'm out or doing something so end up going to bed later after which I'll still get up at the same time the following morning. This makes me more tired so I'll go to bed way earlier on the following night.

Well no, you can just neglect them instead! /s

Small children require a large amount of energy to maintain. If you’re responsible for providing that energy then you’re gonna have less for projects.

>Well no, you can just neglect them instead!

Or outsource the work.

I'm currently doing both of these with success:

- Limit to 1 creative thing per month (music one month, programming the next, etc.) I find it helps to get deep into 1 thing for a while rather than skimming the surface on multiple

- Waking up early, and doing the creative things first (less interruptions in the morning, you have your energy)

Switch to part-time work. Obviously not everyone can, and the quality of roles tends to be lower. But if you care a lot about your creativity and other projects this option is powerful.

https://4dayweek.io/

Hey does have some suggestions further down in the article. I like the bit that precedes the suggestions:

> Most people’s time is eaten up by things like school and work. Obviously if you attend one of these, you should stop. But what else can you do?

Moving side projects earlier in the morning (perhaps as the first thing) worked for me. I can do ordinary [shallow] work late in the evening when I have no energy left for more creative endeavors.

Adjust your spending and lifestyle so you can live with less money, which in turn means you can go to work less, and have more time for you.

I agree with you, but the bigger problem is jobs are always offered in this binary 5 days a week or nothing structure. Its hard to find a job that offers say 20-30 hours a week.

Oh, absolutely. But everything worth doing in life is difficult, and if you really want something badly enough you will find the motivation and dedication to find a way. I also think you'll find it's more common than you think.

If your current boss won't let you step down to 4 days a week (or even some kind of flex 4.5), then it's time to fire your boss and find one that fits better with your life goals.

The best time to start on that process (polish up your resume, interviewing, putting out expressions of interest, etc.) is now. It may very well take years. It will be worth it.

One strategy is to wake up earlier and do your side projects before work.

Accomplish more by sleeping less!