News for hackers. Stuff that matters.

A comment on I need to stop being boring. Parent comment

Re:I need to stop being boring by silicon2401 on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @09:20AM (#30931637)
It's funny because the exact opposite is true for me, and is the reason I won't be having kids. I recovered my creativity and wonder for life through just living life how I want to, rather than based on what I thought was normal or typical. Part of that was rejecting the societal expectation of having kids. Now I have a blast pursuing my interests and looking forward to living the rest of my life this way, without having to make compromises in time or resources for children.
[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by TaupeRanger on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @10:42AM (#30932522)
You can do all of those things with children, and then you won't be a burden on society when you're older, having no one left to care about you except the nursing home staff, and as a bonus you'll get to help continue the human race, which is always good.
[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by witx on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @10:55AM (#30932685)
Because having kids with the mindset of: "I'll be a burden to them instead of the nursing home staff / society" is a great reason to have kids ...
[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by rob74 on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @11:10AM (#30932910)
Plus, beside the moral conundrum of not wanting to be a burden for your children, there's always the possibility that your children will simply not accept the burden and send you to a nursing home anyway...
[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by TaupeRanger on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @11:19AM (#30933055)
No, it's not and I never said it was. It is simply a fact about not having children.
[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by witx on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @11:41AM (#30933405)
Yes you did:

> You can do all of those things with children, and then you won't be a burden on society (...)

[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by rob74 on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @11:08AM (#30932883)
My attitude to "being a burden on society" is: "I paid taxes all my working life, so if I get some of that money back, all the better!". Of course, not having to go to a nursing home is the even better alternative, but unfortunately nobody can rule that out.
[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by TaupeRanger on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @11:24AM (#30933121)
I think a person deserves to get elderly care when needed...I was moreso talking about the fact that no one in the world will literally care about the childless person, because no one younger will be in their life. I think people who decide not to have kids often privilege their well being in their 30s-50s without thinking about how poor and lonely the last 30 years of their lives might be. It's just another angle to consider in this complex decision.
[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by yoyohello13 on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @12:32PM (#30934225)
> no one in the world will literally care about the childless person.

This is entirely dependent on the person. I think you're partially right that nobody will care about you (as much) as your kids (potentially) will.

If you spend your life focusing on yourself, then yeah, nobody will probably care about you. If you spend your life devoted to serving others and making an impact in your community then plenty of people will care about you when you're old. I've known many older people who have done great things for the community and the community gathers together to help them in return.

You affect other people caring about you through your actions.

[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by unsupp0rted on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @11:40AM (#30933399)
Isn't it unethical to have children so as to use them as a safety net later in life, after having conditioned them from birth to attach to you and care for you?
[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by Fricken on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @11:57AM (#30933687)
No, that's how it has been through all history.
[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by unsupp0rted on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @12:06PM (#30933829)
Historical and ethical are two separate things.
[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by willcipriano on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @02:41PM (#30935871)
It's impossible to divorce the two, what we consider ethical is what we have done historically for the most part.
[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by silicon2401 on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @02:04PM (#30935444)
> you won't be a burden on society when you're older, having no one left to care about you except the nursing home staff,

thanks for your concern, but I'm not concerned :)

> help continue the human race, which is always good.

I disagree, which is part of why I'm not having kids!

[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by TaupeRanger on Wednesday April 06, 2022 @06:55PM (#30938475)
Of course you aren't concerned NOW...in 30 or 40 years you certainly will be. But then, you appear to be a nihilistic antinatalist, so there are clearly other issues at play here.
[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by silicon2401 on Thursday April 07, 2022 @12:01PM (#30946334)
> you appear to be a nihilistic antinatalist, so there are clearly other issues at play here.

The only issue I see is you taking the way others live their lives so personally lol

> Of course you aren't concerned NOW...in 30 or 40 years you certainly will be.

Looks like you've never met people who are happy without having kids. Meet some and come back to me, and I think our convo will be more productive

[ Parent | on HN ]
Re:I need to stop being boring by ix101 on Thursday April 07, 2022 @08:27PM (#30951961)
I suspect that people who haven't had kids will not like to admit that they have any regrets about their decision, just like you will rarely find a parent that will say they wish they hadn't had a child.

Once you're over a certain age you can't really change your mind. Some people decide to focus on their careers, but becoming a parent doesn't mean you won't reach your career goals.

[ Parent | on HN ]