You must stop drinking alcohol. It is a depressant. You are literally making yourself feel worse. No amounts consumed in moderation are helpful. Stop, cold turkey. Don't wait to make this change, either, and try not to replace it with an alternative. If you absolutely must find a replacement, try vaping high-CBD hemp flower. I don't know what your country's legal status is for this, though, and that may not be possible. It can be mail ordered from the U.S. (see Tweedle Farms or Fields of Hemp).

CBD weed works really well for me, its helped me stop drinking and stop smoking the THC strains that were really damaging my life. It can be mail-ordered from the United kingdom (see BUDCBD or search cbd buds uk ).

Actually, kava kava is the best I’ve found outside of benzodiazepines.

Benzos don’t work at all for me. I have an Ativan script and it’s useless. Should I be asking for something else?

Dunno, but kava is over the counter in many places.

She has absolutely no business saying that: she's currently part of your problem. Get rid of her and find someone who is emotionally mature enough to help others.

As others have said, find another therapist. We don't have a lot of context to go on here but my therapist who helped me so much never put me down. He often told me important truths but in a way that I could digest and would help me to find successful mechanisms to help outside of the therapist office. If you're not finding that, get another therapist.

i am no specialist but the way the ego works maybe you are making a very high idealized version of you that when compared with the real persona you find a big hiatus between what you perceive you are and the one you want to become. maybe you should relax a little such high standards for a more down-to-earth person, frequently people less exigent are just happiest. i call this the john wayne syndrome because we are trying to be the hero of our own life whereas we are just regular folks. also seek if there are repressed feelings you avoid that are inducing self-abusive behavior

Thank you for your comment. That is absolutely true. I have excuses for everyone except for myself. Intellectually, I realize that, but it’s difficult to fight it. My therapist is trying to help with this. We’ll see how it goes.

> My therapist says I’m emotionally immature.

find a different therapist :)