I spent a lot of time being confused by this, listening to perfectly healthy young people with good paying jobs and no attachments telling me "I wish I could just drop everything and go traveling for months on end like you do" and then just sort of trailing off. "But You Can!!!" I always wanted to shout back. You just don't actually want to do that. Or you would. What that person really wanted was what they had: a stable comfortable job and a nice car and apartment, practicing for the day when they had a wife, kids, lease & mortgage to solidify that reality of "can't go traveling". Sounds pretty comfy, actually. If only they could come to grips with what they wanted and be happy with it.
It might be worth stepping back and looking at what you actually want. You just might find it's what you already have.
The phrasing is revealing, because "revealed preferences" suggests that your actions are somehow in alignment with your true core values, while "unconscious compulsions" suggests that your actions are destructive to your true core values, and you could consider doing some psychological work to realign them.
Psychology suggests the latter view is more realistic, especially if you're not getting any genuine fulfilment from a situation.
It also suggests that unconscious compulsions can be the result of external influences, particularly in childhood, and may not be true preferences at all.
There is a danger to armchair psychological terms but it is extraordinarily fun to use them. :)
What's something someone with a strong entrepreneurial, technical and managerial background (and very good pedigree) can do for maybe 20 hours a week and still pay the bills? I would love to drop out of the race for a few years and smell the roses.
Exactly what you're doing now. But only 20 hours a week of it.
You can spend today having the talks you need to have to make this happen, then start your first sane work week tomorrow.
Consulting. Small business. Almost anything really.
How hard is it to make some $5k per month if you have a skill that you can charge $100+/hour for! About a week and a half of work per month.
I have to admit I find articles like this completely perplexing. As soon as I achieved a little bit of professional success, I dropped full-time work like a hot rock, and I don't miss it at all.
I'm at a place where I don't really need to work full time either, but I haven't figured out a plan for getting out of it.
Perhaps the real madness would be trying to change something that is obviously very important to some part of your soul.
Don't see it as 'slacking off' though. See it as establishing a mature work/life balance.
The problem is that as a startup founder/CTO type the way you work sets the pace and culture for your entire company. And not everyone will be cool with that approach. You could miss out on experienced, senior people who just want to work normal hours and not feel like they're letting the side down.
BTW: I love Denver, just want to see what's up with SF.
EDIT: trust me, I'm not bored.
I couldn't disagree more, if that's indeed what you're saying.
NYC, yes. SF - absolutely not.
I was the third engineer at Eventbrite, and I spent years working many extra hours. After 4 years, it felt like I worked 10 years.
I quit and moved to Europe to try to leave the startup scene, but a month later, I found myself the CTO of a startup in London. The addiction continued. Eventually I found myself back in SF. I'm on my 3rd CTO role now. We're about to raise a series B.
More than I'd like to admit, I want to stop this madness and just enjoy life. Hang out with my family. Perhaps move to Denver or Austin to maintain some semblance of tech life, but get out of the madness. I've been looking at houses in Denver for over a year. And it depresses me.
I know that it can't happen. I know that I'll be working like this until my health prohibits me.