Uses of the Word “Mistake:” 15  
  Uses of the Word “Mistake” in Reference to Actions on the Part of Grantland
   Writers & Editors: 14  
  Uses of the Word “Mistake” in Reference to the Actions of the Outraged: 1

  Compliments Given to Grantland Writers & Editors: 12  
  Manic Pixie Dreamgirl-Esque Words Used to Describe the Late Dr. V: 5

  Total Sentences: 214
  Sentences Mostly About Dr. V: 9

  Mentions of the Motivations and Feelings of Grantland Writers & Editors: 23
  Mentions of the Mean Things Others Have Done: 17
  Mentions of the Sad Feelings of Grantland Writers & Editors: 9
  Mentions of the Sad Feelings of Dr. V’s Family & Friends: 1
  Mentions of Dr. V’s Feelings, Any Kind: 0

  Instances of “Apolog[y/ize]:” 3
  Instances of “Sorry”: 1
  Instances of the Word “Sorry” Directed at Anyone But Caleb Hannan: 0

"2. You need to make it more clear within the piece that Caleb never, at any point, threatened to out her as he was doing his reporting.

3. You need to make it more clear that, before her death, you never internally discussed the possibility of outing her (and we didn’t)."

If you read the original piece without this knowledge it sounds like they wrote an article outing her, told her they would publish it and she then killed herself. What actually seems to have happened is that they only wrote the version of the article outing her after her death.

Feels like 'we dont want to tell the world about it, we just told it to some public figure in your field'

That's all a separate issue from the person's decision to change gender (apologies if this is the wrong verb to describe what she did, I don't intend it to be).

I don't think any of us would have an easy time imagining ourselves in those shoes, but I'd bet that many of us would have an even harder time dealing with it, given how closely we cling to our specific gender trappings.

Some sensitivity to this may have helped.

It would be easier for a person to be honest with the world if the world (and her family, apparently) at least accepted, if not completely understood (because ultimately, it's so subjective that you barely can), gender-change decisions like that.

As for your comment about it being 2700 words too long, the original post here is the only professionally published article I've read on the subject since Simmons' statement (which includes articles on Salon, Washington Post, Deadspin, etc.) which continues to phrase the events as though Hannan acted maliciously. The reason for the length of Simmons' apology was to make clear that Hannan and the editorial staff were extremely unfamiliar with trans* issues, and that it was that lack of education, and not personal hate or bigotry, that caused Hannan to make the mistakes (which Simmons, it should be noted, takes full responsibility for) he did. He didn't realize how grave it is to out someone in the trans* community in life or death, and to him it fit the narrative he found, of an inventor whose life was a complete lie. Again, he didn't understand that keeping a gender identity secret is done out of necessity in our culture, and is not in any way a statement of one's personal veracity. Grantland also published an op-ed by ESPN's Christina Kahrl, who is transgender, in which she eviscerates Hannan and the editorial staff's actions (http://grantland.com/features/what-grantland-got-wrong/). Note that at no point in her attack on Hannan's actions does she attribute it to maliciousness. To quote, "revealing her gender identity was ultimately as dangerous as it was thoughtless."

EDIT: I guess I should I add something, just so I don't get accused of anything. I attended one of the most progressive high schools in the country, and now attend one of the most progressive colleges, and know many LGBTQ and trans* individuals, with a few of the former counted among my closest friends. I believe that one's identity is theirs and theirs alone until they choose (if ever) to come out, and I also strongly believe that active sexual and gender discrimination is a hate-crime. My point is not that Grantland was not horribly horribly wrong. They were. My point is that it was a lack of education that caused their errors, and that the opportunity should be used to continue educating, which Simmons' piece, even if it seems at times to be attempting to shoehorn in an excuse, does. I know the errors they made, but I'm sure the vast majority of Grantland's readership does not.