Source: many years clean in NA
I agree with the poster who mentioned Infinite Jest as capturing some of the subjective experience of the "insanity" of an addict.
I can even think of more than one person of top of my head that is obsessive about stuff and does not consume drugs.
I think... I just never learned focus, discipline, self-control, portion-control, when to stop. I think it's a habit more than anything else. I think I've always had some "addictive" personality, but I think I could've kept it in better check if I developed habits of discipline and control- which I never really did.
It says just about what I would have guessed too. :)
For one source that hit home for me, see Addiction as an Attachment Disorder by Philip Flores
This is a very important distinction, because AA goes to great lengths to clarify that the "higher power" is one of your own understanding. It is not Jesus, it is not a Christian-Jewish-Muslim God. It is simply something "bigger than yourself" which exists and which you can feel comfortable addressing.
It could be the Pacific Ocean for all you care. It just must be bigger than you.
If you're not religious, community can be your higher power. The point is more that will-power alone is not enough for some people.
This is why addicts talk to other addicts; because other addicts "get it" and can provide help in overcoming the problem that isn't just "learn how to use your own will power". That's just condescending.
It's obvious, really; if it were that simple, there would be a great deal less addicts in the world.
Actually an interesting observation on how difficult it is to draw the line between obsession and passion. It seems that she (can devlop) an extremely high level of focus, something that what would probably regarded by many as a trait for becoming successful in a specific discipline.
What I'm wondering is if we could extract some positive gain from this. Maybe there's a way to gamify certain activities so that people could hook themselves on something positive. I know this has been done for certain types of exercise (I can't recall any webapps right now but a simple search for mobile apps should show a hundred or so.) I'm curious if it would work for such things as meditation, self-study, diet, social activity, etc.
I get the feeling there's a lot of research out there about gamification, but I wonder if there are any webapps out there allowing people to gamify <whatever> in their life so as to allow the person to more efficiently build positive habbits. If it hasn't been done, maybe this is a new market niche to be taken advantage of.
If anyone finds anything or is interested in potentially collaborating, let me know. I'll be looking into it myself in the meantime.
EDIT: After reading a bit, I just remembered https://chains.cc/ was posted to HN a while back.
Focus/Dedication is something you can choose to do, it's a tool you can use (though some people's tools work better than others). When you need to stop you can and then move onto other things.
Obsession is something that controls you, you are the tool being used, and when it's time to move on the obsession continues to control you keeping you under its thumb.
If only she could bring herself to getting hooked on a creative endeavour, she would achieve remarkable results.
Reminds me of the famous toddler marshmallow experiment - how kids able to endure delayed gratification tend to be more successful later in life.
"a puzzle game on her phone that she would play obsessively* -- forgetting to eat, sleep, show up for work, having basic human interaction and even requiring physical therapy at one point for the muscle strain of sitting in the position to play the game for hours on end."
What we are probably dealing with here is more than a simple addiction (to which your suggestion is good and would definitely be in the right direction). What we have is a mental problem that includes addictive traits.
After all the DSM is fairly arbitrary (as are medical definitions).
e.g. I can't even conceive of a scenario where I could find myself thinking about willingly even trying heroin or cocaine. But I have a few family members and (former) friends with addiction problems so severe that pounding a case of beer before snorting lines is what they call a normal Thursday afternoon and heroin is considered a weekend recreational sport. Something predisposed them to the notion that this was a valid idea whereas I can't even conceive of it.
That said I'm not reading what you are saying the OP is possibly suggesting at all.
He says:
"One of my relatives, for example, managed to get herself off of drinking and smoking completely and was in counseling. The addictions, and the kinds of behaviors that come with maintaining addictions (all kinds of dissociative, anti-social, manipulative weirdness) were ruining her life. Strange thing was, after removing the substance, the behaviors persisted."
I don't see anything that suggests that the initial addiction caused further addictions at all in the above paragraph.
This part. Seems an odd thing to say if you knew the person had addictive behavior before... perhaps I'm misreading it.
I find this like saying that other people might have addiction problems, but you don't have the personality so you can take it or leave it.
The OP can chime in, but your interpretation (which I considered) doesn't seem to fit what I just quoted.
Forsaking all news sources except HN is narrow-minded, but not a good example of addiction. Spending hours refreshing, and replying to all the comments to the point where you are neglecting other responsibilities: addiction.
edit: oops, redundant reply because I had this open for 30 min & didn't refresh before replying.
In that case, oxygen and protecting your family would not be regarded as addictions.
Has she been robbing people to pay for her habit? Selling herself?
However, I have family members who have deep addiction problems. Life affecting. One thing that I've noticed is that even when they get off of the substance, the addictive personality traits are still there -- years later.
One of my relatives, for example, managed to get herself off of drinking and smoking completely and was in counseling. The addictions, and the kinds of behaviors that come with maintaining addictions (all kinds of dissociative, anti-social, manipulative weirdness) were ruining her life. Strange thing was, after removing the substance, the behaviors persisted.
Many months later, after quitting drinking and smoking, we found that she was latching onto other activities in an addictive way. For example, she found a puzzle game on her phone that she would play obsessively* -- forgetting to eat, sleep, show up for work, having basic human interaction and even requiring physical therapy at one point for the muscle strain of sitting in the position to play the game for hours on end. Crippling physical pain wasn't even enough to get her to stop -- it was what was providing her "fix". She would sit, literally for days straight and play it. Counseling eventually got her to recognize this addiction, but it was harder for her to stop since she had her phone on her at all times.
Then one day she stopped and we all breathed a sigh of relief -- she started sending emails again and generally became more communicative. A few weeks later the behaviors started again, but it wasn't with her phone. Turned out she had just found a computer game she liked more and switched off the phone game.
Today she manages a bit better, but she went through a smoking binge for a while. She's "quit" again, but now just habitually chews nicotine gum. Apparently the nicotine helps keep her off of other more destructive behaviors (like playing phone games obsessively). When she feels stressed, she just chews some nicotine gum and that seems to get her through the craving. She's back working a regular job now and doing okay, but the idea that she'll find some other, better, satisfier, scares everybody.
* - obsession is outright scary when you see it in another human for real. It makes a mood swing look like a flat affect. A person who's addictively obsessed with something is almost feral, operating on instinct -- except with human level brain power to alter their environment to maintain the obsession.