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Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by LoganDark on Monday July 20, 2026 @01:45PM (#48982177)
In all seriousness, people often commit suicide when they feel like nobody wants them around anyway. He may not have registered that his loss would be a negative to those around him, even those closest to him.
Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by VirusNewbie on Monday July 20, 2026 @01:46PM (#48982187)
Isn't that the definition of being selfish?
Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by ceejayoz on Monday July 20, 2026 @01:47PM (#48982200)
No, selfish would be more like knowing it, being of reasonably sound mind, and doing it anyways.

Being convinced of something by wonky brain chemistry isn't necessarily a personal failing.

Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by VirusNewbie on Monday July 20, 2026 @02:05PM (#48982530)
My brain chemistry tells me i'm better than most people and deserve more. Is that...selfish?
Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by ceejayoz on Monday July 20, 2026 @02:06PM (#48982544)
That depends significantly on how wonky it is.

There's a big spectrum between "just knowingly a dick" and "deeply delusional".

Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by LoganDark on Monday July 20, 2026 @02:16PM (#48982689)
Specifically, that would be arrogance and entitlement. Both are typically considered selfish.

We don't know whether brain chemistry alone leads to this. The traits are complex enough that most likely it is a result of social conditioning rather than only genetics. Genetics may still play a role however, especially epigenetics.

Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by foco_tubi on Monday July 20, 2026 @02:27PM (#48982864)
No, clinically that is known as a delusion.
Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by LoganDark on Monday July 20, 2026 @01:59PM (#48982413)
I feel like ascribing it to "wonky brain chemistry" serves to erase agency. I read the article and there are very real and reoccurring reasons of incredible mistreatment for why this happened. It is not because he was simply unstable and decided to try suicide for no reason. He had such a reason that I am incredibly disappointed in the entire system that led to this.
Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by ceejayoz on Monday July 20, 2026 @02:01PM (#48982454)
> I feel like ascribing it to "wonky brain chemistry" serves to erase agency.

Wonky brain chemistry can erase agency.

(As can an empty bank account from an insurance denial!)

Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by LoganDark on Monday July 20, 2026 @02:06PM (#48982537)
I mean, I don't agree with the assumption that he was simply irrational and chose this because he wasn't thinking straight. I would much rather believe that he had strong reasons for this and that there is something to be done about the circumstances that led to it. Suicide is more often than not a systemic failure and not simply an outlier to be ignored.

If you read the article and see all the shit that he went through before he died it should be obvious that he's not the one at fault for breaking under that pressure. Not everyone has the strength to brave such bullshit.

Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by ceejayoz on Monday July 20, 2026 @02:10PM (#48982580)
> I mean, I don't agree with the assumption that he was simply irrational and chose this because he wasn't thinking straight.

And I don't agree with the assertions that that's not a possibility.

Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by LoganDark on Monday July 20, 2026 @02:20PM (#48982760)
I don't consider it a possibility that state of mind would not have been a result of his mistreatment. You seem to recognize it can be brought about by situations, and I consider that reasoning enough. You don't have to perfectly calculate suicide as the only practical answer in order for your actions to be reasoned. Even primal reasoning can count.
Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by ceejayoz on Monday July 20, 2026 @02:28PM (#48982878)
> I don't consider it a possibility that state of mind would not have been a result of his mistreatment.

Why? There are very well treated people who still get suicidal.

Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by pstuart on Monday July 20, 2026 @02:23PM (#48982809)
Sometimes brain chemistry obliterates agency.
Re:My husbands suicide shows theres something very wrong wit... by LoganDark on Monday July 20, 2026 @01:49PM (#48982229)
Sure, suicide can be incredibly selfish, but there are other factors at play here. It's not like he just decided he wanted to harm everybody around him. There are basically always much stronger motivations that stem from very tragic mistreatment and that deserves more recognition than however morally incorrect or disrespectful to others it is to end one's own life.

I say this as someone who has attempted and who knows multiple others who have attempted. None of those attempts were intended to harm anyone. They were meant to put an end to unbearable suffering that had no apparent other way out.