i went to therapy for 2 years with this perspective that the therapist would fix me like the mechanic fixes my car. I spent 2 hours a week with a psychiatrist & therapist bitching about my life thinking eventually I would get "better".

but then i realized that wasn't getting any better. it's not their responsibility to "fix" me. the only person that could help me was me.

the first thing we reach for is an external solution to solve or escape our current problems and everything is so commoditized that there is something that we can fixate our attention on.

i think that reflecting this fixation inward has made all the difference for me personally.

Therapy is such a broad spectrum from psychoanalysis to behavior therapy. It is very unlikely that you just click with the first therapist that you visit, it can take years to find someone.

Two years without any tangible progress sound extremely unethical from the therapist. Yes, therapy takes time but it still something you do for a fixed time period with hopefully clear goals where you track your progress.

And yes, the actual work is done by the patient. Just like a personal trainer can not just work out for you.

> The modern cure to all problems. Going to the gym if you feel unfit. Incredible insight.

Before that you are irresponsible to bring new people into this world and should be ashamed.

I’d find meaning in giving conferences about how not to do such mistakes in this world. But I already know how much hateful and resentful the majority of people are. To the point of hanging the guy who said “Love each other”, for starters.

So no, I won’t bear the children seeded by others. Their mistakes, not mine.

And yes, I’ll still complain that I couldn’t pick up girls at high school, or barely since. Because dating a future millionaire is such a bad decision in life.

Familiy is an option. But being curios and having hobbies also. Or helping people around you. Or starting to think about the people around you and enjoying the support you can provide.

I had my nihilistic depression phase for a decade. There is not much to it.

There are countless stupid fun in the world that money can do that isn't about buying out a human or legally punching an NPC in face. As well as legit meaningful businesses that may or may not make money but kinda fun and useful. The fact that this person is being unable to come up with such a task suggests existence of a problem, though I wouldn't know if it's mental or developmental or physical or circumstantial.

So, go join that boxing/bjj gym and learn just how pathetically average you really are!