Our (the states) reliance on car central culture is killing us in more ways than one.

I grew up in the suburbs and you could easily go a week without substantially interacting with people.

Jump in your metal capsule, drive 7 mins to Walmart, walk quietly across the huge parking lot, get your item and return home.

Contrasted with dense urban city with public transit, you will serendipitously bump into people and be forced to interact more with society, even if it is just exchanging pleasantries.

This is killing ourselves socially, not to mention how much cars cause physical death.

That 'dense urban landscape' basically does not exist outside of NYC in the US. I'm not sure I'd choose it as a forever home anyway.

For me personally, when looking for a 'forever home' I'm starting to look at smaller college towns. They often have a walkable core around the college, you have access to continuing education opportunities and a college library.

While yes, living around a gaggle of college age kids can be tiring as you get older, a local university fosters a lot of intellectual vibrancy that you wouldn't get without it. You can always hang out with the older folks who teach the classes and serve the college age population.

I assure you that living in the city you can easily go about your business for a week or more without talking to anyone if you so choose. People who don't know each other don't interact with each other in the city.

In affluent white neighborhoods somewhat true. Not at all true in my part of the city.

I loved living in a city more than I like driving around the suburbs, but suburbs exist and you can't wave a magic wand and turn them into cities. Being mad at cars isn't a solution, they're necessary for how much of the country is laid out.

And I feel like this could all come to no good

The kids who populate these cul-de-sacs will never know what stood

Beneath their cookie-cutter houses, fields and streams and woods

They'll sit in cars and wait for mom to drive them out of this boring neighborhood

- Defiance, Ohio; “Oh! Susquehanna”

I do improvisational comedy. The improv community is very small despite being in a major metropolitan area.

This is one of those things that if you find people into the same thing, you can instantly bond over since it is quite niche

I only wish that is true, beyond the one close friend I made. There are gaps in my social skillset and mentality that makes it difficult for me to achieve.

Pub quiz meetings, art galleries, film festivals.

Literally pick any half-organized activity. They’ll be posted all over the Web (sorry, you will probably need a Facebook account), your city’s website may have lists of organizations, and there are probably some fliers posted at the library (and the library may run a few gatherings themselves!)

Those are so important! I often struggle to suggest activities other than sports

Piggy backing to add - running clubs, book clubs, board game clubs, church if you're religious.

In my case a local makerspace to play board games. I've made a few friends that I hang out with outside the space -- sometimes I host events in my home, sometimes we go out to get dinner or whatever.

Tennis and rock climbing. Sports are easy gateways for friendship

Volunteer work. I volunteer with one group (and have been doing this for almost 8 years now). I can't believe how many friends I have just from this one activity.

Neighbors. Just start talking to them. Have them over. We do this for football (NFL) games or just for dinner.

Surprisingly (or maybe not). Kpop concerts. My wife is very into this music scene. She has definitely made friends she keeps in touch with (friends she met at the concert). I went to one and I couldn't believe how many fans went alone and formed their own groups at the concert to watch/dance. And this is for all ages (I saw 80 year olds down to the teenagers). Edit: I should note that the concerts she has been to did not cost an arm and a leg.

Both X and Bluesky are surprisingly pleasant places if you mute/block political keywords and accounts.

Bluesky notably having powerful blocklists.

"Technology got us into this problem, and technology will get us out of it!"

Gotta meet where the people are to get them unstuck!

Do people even do that any more? Serious question. I'm old and literally have no idea!

Community college noncredit courses.

Classes are actually so great for meeting new people. Caveat: needs to be in person

Just sign to a gym. Not the pumping iron ones. Sign up to a martial arts gym, a dance studio, an art school. Anything that is more of a social activity, and that YOU LIKE. If you find a group of people that share the same niche interest that you genuinely have, you make friends. My personal advice to the engineer type of guys, is go to a BJJ gym if you want to practice something that is extremely challenging both physically and intellectually. The number of techniques is virtually infinite, and you can become good by simply memorizing more tech than your average jock. So, to make male friends (but not only that) go to a BJJ gym. If you want to meet girls, go to a dance studio. Both skills will be really valuable in terms of physical and mental health throughout your life, apart from the friends you'll make.

Hacker News.

I find HN more depressing than other social media. It's more focused on money, more anonymous (which isn't necessarily bad, but harder to connect with people), but mostly it's by far the most arrogant. I became a lot happier when I stopped showing up here regularly.

Def on the higher end of social media IQ spectrum

Certainly likes to pretend that it is, anyway.

Wouldn’t mind that’s for sure

Clan, guild and hood

Pickleball courts

I gave up before lockdown, and it turned out I was just preparing for what everybody else felt was the social apocalypse.