News for hackers. Stuff that matters.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @03:28AM (#39417244)
As the great american philosopher Dan Bilzerian once said: "Guys nowadays work 5 times harder to get a woman 20 times shittier than their grandfather got 50 years ago". More seriously... this article doesn't say anything relevant in today's world. It says that men suck at relationships. Really ? thanks for the generalization. Like no women suck at relationships ? Like most women are good enough with sex to retain their partner ? Have you never met women having no decent skill to bring to a healthy relationship while expecting everything from the guy ? What about the evolution of the nature of relationships ? what about social networks & dating sites failing to match compatible people to maintain their business model ? What about society expecting men & women both working at least 40 to 50 hours per week and are still expected to have fun together in their spare time ? This whole thing is fucked up.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by wiseowise on Sunday February 18, 2024 @04:00AM (#39417417)
> Guys nowadays work 5 times harder to get a woman 20 times shittier than their grandfather got 50 years ago

That’s survivorship bias. You know your grandfather got great woman, because he already did.

All of this is pure luck, you can increase your chances by exposing yourself to more opportunities to meet more women, but it’s not a guarantee that you’ll get your dream girlfriend.

Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @04:33AM (#39417598)
Indeed.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by spiderfarmer on Sunday February 18, 2024 @03:45AM (#39417348)
If men cannot admit a fault without asking “but what about”, then they are, in fact, at fault even more.

It only shows how insecure and resentful they are. Some very unattractive traits.

Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @03:57AM (#39417399)
Isn't it the same for women ?
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by wiseowise on Sunday February 18, 2024 @04:01AM (#39417430)
You’ve just replied with “what about” to a comment that pointed out “what about”.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @04:17AM (#39417508)
So why would my "what about" be less relevant ?
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by wiseowise on Sunday February 18, 2024 @05:40AM (#39417970)
Because if your only argument is “what about” then it’s not an argument. You’re just diverting original discussion.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @06:07AM (#39418104)
Why is it bad to divert the original discussion in a newly dedicated thread ?
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by spiderfarmer on Sunday February 18, 2024 @01:15PM (#39421465)
Read the rules and make an effort to comprehend them.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Monday February 19, 2024 @03:41AM (#39427396)
Indeed it says "don't be snarky" first line for comments. I'm not the one being snarky, unless proven otherwise.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by account-5 on Sunday February 18, 2024 @05:00AM (#39417731)
It's not less relevant, it's just not the point.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @08:41AM (#39418982)
I think it is to the point tbh.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by spiderfarmer on Sunday February 18, 2024 @01:13PM (#39421453)
Well, in fact, it’s not.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by spiderfarmer on Sunday February 18, 2024 @05:01AM (#39417740)
Thanks for proving my point.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @05:40AM (#39417971)
I appreciate your perspective, but I'm not entirely convinced that this proves anything. We seem to have differing opinions on this matter.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by spiderfarmer on Sunday February 18, 2024 @06:16AM (#39418145)
Just know that your opinions make you even more unattractive. It will chase all women away and cause a feedback loop that can only result in you becoming a very unhappy extremist. Don’t be blind and apathetic. Expand your views. Live a little.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @08:24AM (#39418858)
Not sure why you consider me as single without life. While I keep my dating life for myself, I have girlfriends who went through divorce and painful things I carefully avoided while I had the best experiences I could dream about. And I know a good divorce lawyer who just bought his 3rd lamborghini thanks to people like you. I see you still live in the land of rainbows and unicorns.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by stavros on Sunday February 18, 2024 @03:58AM (#39417408)
> Guys nowadays work 5 times harder to get a woman 20 times shittier than their grandfather got 50 years ago

This makes no sense at all. How would this even happen, when there's roughly one woman for every man?

Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @04:21AM (#39417535)
You'd be surprised to know the answer...
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by stavros on Sunday February 18, 2024 @04:28AM (#39417575)
I have a feeling I won't be surprised at all at how little sense it'll make.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by livinginfear on Sunday February 18, 2024 @04:26AM (#39417564)
Social customs surrounding sex inside marriage, or even sex inside a relationship have changed over time. Successful men have sexual access to more than one woman (If that's what they want). Sure, eventually people settle down and pair off, but before that happens the market is completely different.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by stavros on Sunday February 18, 2024 @04:27AM (#39417570)
I really doubt that a small group of men now hoards 70% of the women.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @04:42AM (#39417645)
The 3rd graph of the article talks by itself...
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by stavros on Sunday February 18, 2024 @04:49AM (#39417681)
People not going on dates?
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @04:56AM (#39417708)
Yes, plus the 5% getting 10+ dates per year
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by stavros on Sunday February 18, 2024 @05:00AM (#39417733)
That graph doesn't say first dates. It's just people dating the same person a lot. Even if it was first dates, that doesn't mean much.

I'd advise you to think about what these things mean, rather than draw wrong conclusions from propaganda.

Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @05:19AM (#39417846)
I'd prefer that you keep your advices for yourself. It seems the american "date" has a different cultural meaning than in other parts of the world where it doesn't exist as such. If you go to Europe and say you "date" 10+ times the same person in a year, you'd be considered as someone desperate. Dating in Europe just refers to the first encounter.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by stavros on Sunday February 18, 2024 @05:47AM (#39418013)
I'm Greek, thanks for the explanation though.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @09:13AM (#39419216)
You're welcome
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by watwut on Sunday February 18, 2024 @05:47AM (#39418011)
> If you go to Europe and say you "date" 10+ times the same person in a year, you'd be considered as someone desperate. Dating in Europe just refers to the first encounter.

That is not true. In various European languages, the local equivalent of the word date includes settled couples going out together. If you go on date 10 times with the same person, you are considered to be in the beginning stage of the relationship.

10 dates with the same person with frequency of 3 dates a week is three weeks of knowing each other. That is not deep into the relationship yet anyway, it is beginning stage of a romance. Assuming you are looking for a stable relationship rather then hook up.

Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @08:38AM (#39418971)
Yes but tfa is in english, not everyone "dates" the same way.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by watwut on Sunday February 18, 2024 @12:20PM (#39420903)
Yeah but person I responded to argued about "Europe". Unless they meant "in UK" when they wrote "Europe" then they implied other languages.

The article seems to be focused on finding long term relationship. It considers "not single" status to be a success. When you have one night stands, you are considered single.

Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Monday February 19, 2024 @03:42AM (#39427405)
I see, interesting.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by livinginfear on Sunday February 18, 2024 @04:39AM (#39417632)
No one hoards women. If the top 10% of men had sexual access to more than one woman at a time, without committing to any of them in a monogamous relationship, that alone would be enough to change the dating landscape significantly. Assuming that the women involved weren't in a different relationship at the time.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by stavros on Sunday February 18, 2024 @04:49AM (#39417674)
Exactly, you're assuming that the man "had sexual access to more than one woman at a time", whereas the women were exclusive to that man. That's basically the definition of hoarding.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @05:31AM (#39417921)
what makes you think that "women were exclusive to that man" ?
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by stavros on Sunday February 18, 2024 @05:48AM (#39418015)
Because if they aren't, we're back to one woman per man...
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @08:37AM (#39418963)
No, look China for example. Many single men, because women know what they want.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by stavros on Sunday February 18, 2024 @08:41AM (#39418987)
Is "what they want" the one-child policy?
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @09:14AM (#39419222)
Not really
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by watwut on Sunday February 18, 2024 @03:46AM (#39417355)
The article goes at length about dating apps. And the article contains quite a lot about women.
Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by almatabata on Sunday February 18, 2024 @07:10AM (#39418402)
> It says that men suck at relationships

I think you are hyper focusing on one very small paragraph title. The same paragraph labels it as a theory:

"A theory that the core problem is that most men are terrible in relationships even when they are superficially fine, women learn this, and thus men whose selling point is their stability cannot get dates."

Most of the article I find is mostly gender neutral. It also contradicts the usual claim that women/men will have to go on dates with an endless amount of losers:

"There is the stereotype of the person (usually but not always a woman) who goes on dates constantly, finding an endless string of losers. The data here suggests that this essentially is not a thing, or that if you do that it works."

There are definitely articles blaming everything on men but this article is not one of those.

Re:Why You're Still Single (2023) by earlone on Sunday February 18, 2024 @08:27AM (#39418884)
Yes agree, but it's much more fun to debate on this topic in particular :)