I respectfully disagree that this was a personal attack. If you'd be so kind as to point out how it was, then I'd love to learn more.
I realize that you meant well but repeatedly putting someone down like this is not the way to help them on the internet. Maybe if you were talking in person and had already established a good personal connection, it would be robust enough to withstand that sort of language. On the internet, though (and maybe not only on the internet), that's not the case.
People using 'tough love' language generally feel that it's justified because their intentions are good, but you can't know that unless you have a lot of information about how it's landing with the other person, and by default, it probably isn't going to land well at all.
Try to make the world around you a better place. Maybe you want to tutor below grade-level kids, tutor high performing kids, help with the homeless challenge in your community, volunteer with the humane society, volunteer with hospice, do some environmental projects, help out with a niche historical society, volunteer at the zoo, etc. The point being, do something (in meat space) for your community that you connect with, and you will come into contact with like-minded people who may or may not be “cool”, but they at least want to help out the world around them too. There’s that old saying “it is better to give than to receive.” If you aren’t already, give that a try. :)
My grandfather was an avid volunteer, far more busy in retirement than most working people. My dad once lamented in a family gathering that he (my dad) didn’t want to retire for fear of becoming bored. My grandfather just said in his special way that is hard to convey, “there’s a lot of good organizations that could use some help.”
All the best to you and your search!
Sure, the premature judgement is bad but hanging around people who share different values and on different trajectories is not the solution.
The only solution here is to take massive action to expose one to different groups of people and if nothing works, move somewhere else.
It's 100% okay to have friends that border more on acquaintances, who might lead you to other more interesting people.
My advice: get over yourself, you're your own worst enemy.
You might not love the people you meet at those meetups, for instance, but if you auto-reject everyone you meet you'll never wind up meeting people via those second or third tier connections. Nothing is saying you have to want to be best friends or date those people you decry, but you're cutting yourself off from potential groups of people that you could be introduced to. You're your own worst enemy here.
Getting a dog or traveling, as others here have said, probably won't fix it - a dog can't help you better yourself, and traveling might hide the issue but you'll still be the same ineffective blocked off "you" wherever you go. Work on yourself more.