Yeah, me too. This is one of those instances where for this specific purpose, I kinda wish the manufacturers had access to the data of which features people use. All the complicated multi-timer stuff for cooking different types of foods is so rarely used that I wouldn't even trust that I know how to program it correctly if I ever wanted to. I imagine that if they had telemetry on feature use, they'd realize that everything but the most dirt-simple UI is completely wasted effort on their part. Of course, the bells and whistles are how they fill checkboxes, so there's a marketing aspect to it even if it's worthless. Most people are going to look at two otherwise equal microwaves and pick the one with the best feature list.

BTW, amusingly enough, my microwave manages to overcomplicate even the "add 30 seconds" button, because after 7 presses, it switches to "add 60 seconds". You can't use it to do 4:00 because the 8th press goes from 3:30 to 4:30. :D

Edit: I should add that I absolutely do not want my microwave to record telemetry and phone home with it. But if they could magically know that 99.99% of user scenarios could be covered without all the fancy features, I think that would be useful.

But how many times do you have to spam-press that button to heat a decent meal properly? I'd rather have a dial than having to press a single button 8 times for 4 minutes of heating.

Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.

To reheat a "decent meal"†, you usually need to microwave the components of it separately, since they'll have very different thermal masses. And if you're doing that, each individual component isn't going to take very long. One minute for this (2 presses), two minutes for that (4 presses). The overhead of swapping meal components in/out swamps the button-presses.

Plus, if there's any sauce in any components, you'll need to be stopping the timer every 2.5 minutes to stir it around, lest you get a sauce that starts boiling/burning in some parts while still being frozen/tepid in others.

† As in, "something better than a TV dinner." One of the main reasons (other than cost) that TV dinners generally have such strange/unpleasant/non-complementary side-dishes in them, is the fact that the components of the meal are chosen to all have matching reheat times. (And even then, many still have instructions requiring you take things out half-way to poke holes in plastic etc., to switch some meal-components from being both irradiated themselves while also being steamed by irradiated water, to only being directly irradiated.)

> such strange/unpleasant/non-complementary side-dishes

I'm curious, what's an example?

All the frozen dinners at my supermarket are a protein (beef, chicken, turkey) with a starch (noodles, mashed potatoes) and maybe frozen veggies. Often with sauce/gravy. All totally normal.

I'm struggling to imagine a strange/unpleasant side dish.

Really, you find that peas-and-carrots combo not unpleasant? Maybe a normally fine veggie combination, but when frozen and then tossed in a microwave...

I think peas and carrots are a pretty common vegetable combination even when fresh.

And of all vegetables these freeze and microwave pretty well!

I mean, it's perfectly pleasant. Delicious, even.

Also, freezing and then microwaving is literally indistinguishable from steaming fresh over hot water in a pot.

The whole point of freezing is that no flavor or nutrients are lost, only texture because cell walls burst -- but then you lose the crunchy texture because cell walls burst equivalently when steaming anyways, which is why freezing+microwaving works so well. Nothing is lost at all.

Another way of looking at this is that in the best case frozen plus microwave veg mix can match up to a way of cooking fresh veggies that is easy but with bland results, and only that if you ignore texture....

I occasionally steam veg, but more often Blanche and then do something else with them, not something that works as well with frozen.

Also, losing texture isn't a small thing.

Have you.. actually tried steaming something?

I've cooked various cuisines at home for decades, including a stint in a professional kitchen.

I'm not suggesting you microwave your shumai dumplings or your egg custard.

But for your standard fibrous veggies like peas, carrots, broccoli, cauliflower, lima beans, etc.?

Yes, frozen plus microwaved vs. steamed yields identical results, provided you stir in the microwave every minute to avoid building up hot spots. It's just physics.

Ok you've added 'fibrous' now, and to be honest of that list I've only steamed peas, but quickly realised I prefer boiling them if nothing else than because it's easier.

I tried kale in the microwave once (with a bit of water and covered in cling film (seran(?) wrap)) and it was awful.

To me at least 'stir in the microwave every minute to avoid building up hot spots' just isn't easier, I only use mine for defrosting/reheating things (I live alone so there's always multiple portions left over).

If we're going down this route, 'Really, you find any microwave ready-meal in its entirety not unpleasant'?

I've had some microwaved meals that were really rather nice -- Saffron Road's Indian dishes are pretty good, for instance.

The UX for mine almost gets it right...

If I hit 1,2, or 3, it will cook for that many minutes with some (very minor) level of 'sensing'; If you hit 3 when you meant 1 you're still gonna get a dry brick still, but I don't find myself having to 'fine tune' my cook time to the second.

However, I never remember the right order of events to specify a power level, because this thing apparently lets you pre-program multiple cooking phases (e.x. 6 mins at 50%, then 3 mins at 30%).

And honestly, it would probably be a great feature if they didn't skimp out on the screen or buttons.

I'm imagining something where either the buttons light up (for example, to clarify whether I'm setting Power level, or Time) or a screen that doesn't feel like it came out of a 1980s LED Calculator warehouse.

I recently bought the Alexa enabled Amazon microwave. I just say “Alexa, microwave at power level 5 for five minutes”, and it starts right up. Of course the first time I tried saying “Alexa, microwave at 50% power for five minutes” but Alexa helpfully said “you have to select a power level between 1 and 10”, so the UX was easy to grok and I haven’t messed it up after the first try.

Mine has a knob rather than numeric pad, but also that 'start with default 30s' button. So I hit 'start' then spin the knob, no multiple press or beep required.

The only things I heat for more than a minute require stirring or repositioning every 60 seconds anyways, unless I want a burnt bottom while the top is still ice.

If it's more than 60s or 90s, depending on whether the microwave starts when you hit +30s, you just use the actual time, which is usually 4-5 button presses including hitting start.

For many things, I agree that dials are the easiest. The only downsides are needing to be careful if you want exact times and not having adjustable power levels. A microwave with a dial for power would be awesome though.

Exact times are just fooling yourself.

I would say most UK microwaves have a time knob and up/down buttons for power.

They're helpful for certain things, like cold bread (15s is great, 20+s is too much).

What is cold bread, and what's the output, after these 15s?

Keeping bread in the fridge and want it very quickly room temperature for a rush sandwich? Does it really need to be in the fridge?

Yes and yes. It doesn't need to be in the fridge, but certain kinds go moldy much slower there.

My favorites are the ones where the first couple number buttons (say, 1-6ish) are shortcuts for the corresponding minutes. If I need a non-30s divisible time, or something longer it's more presses ("Time Cook" and then the entire time, then "Start") but for 95% (at least) of what I use it for it's faster.

I mean my microwave has an electronic dial to enter the time which increments by 5 seconds starting at 10 seconds, and a Start/Another 30s more button, so you can set it to any time very quickly. It's the cheapest model that doesn't have the physical mechanical controls.

I think it depends on one's definition of "decent meal" :-). I can put a frozen burrito into my microwave, press "1 minute," press "+30 seconds," and have a perfectly acceptable breakfast in two presses.

Over time the digital dials go a bit rubbish and sometimes jump up and sometimes down and all over the place as you try to dial it up. I have to revert to using beep beep beep on mine to build up the 30seconds.

Mine has the 30s button, but also a numeral pad that if I want 5 minutes of heating I just hit the “6” button once and it starts already with 6 minutes. Pretty good UX

>if I want 5 minutes of heating I just hit the “6” button once and it starts already with 6 minutes. Pretty good UX

and then stop it with a minute left?

Yep! Just in case I realize it needs to go back for a bit extra heating.