Hell, the Buffalo Wild Wings in Daly City has a more diverse crowd than any bar or restaurant in SF.

I'm sure a few people cashed out along the way.

My excitement wore off when I realized that it was literally all budweiser products and most of them had the exact same thing.

I added that bit.

Funny, they always seem to forget about family, even when talking about 30-somethings from hip rental apartments.

In a less abstract sense, roughly 50% of my close friends who did the the whole "move to the burbs, ditch the social life, start a family" and who seemed to go missing for years are now divorced. Roughly in line with the statistics I suppose.

I'd go as far as saying that in the majority of cases when people in their 20s or 30s do this it's some sort of mix of social pressure and biological clock panic than an actual authentic decision.

I personally hopefully a lot because I pay a lot of attention to cultivate them. My grandparents throughout their entire life had a rich social life up until the very end with friendships lasting decades, they even lived entirely autonomously in a cooperative community for the elderly.

It's my parents, who are now 60-ish, who have no friends. Because unlike my grandparents they grew up in what was peak nuclear family era. I'm not repeating that mistake and it's pretty sad that people here don't even seem to be able to imagine authentic communal life.

On the contrary, we’ve never been more lonely and distant as a society. Family gives you a chance of a more permanent safety net and nuclear community. Friends and community are important, but today’s version of these things appears flimsy at best.

https://today.yougov.com/topics/lifestyle/articles-reports/2...

https://www.vox.com/science-and-health/2019/8/1/20750047/mil...

https://www.hrsa.gov/enews/past-issues/2019/january-17/lonel...

yes, because all communal institutions have been disbanded before millennials were even born, that was the point?

Millenials are lonely because they're the offspring of what was the peak of the nuclear family generation. They're growing up without any communal connection, increasingly without religious communities, Gen Z probably doesn't even have military experience and has largely replaced physical with digital connections and seems to be even more isolated than Millenials.

The nuclear family isn't safety but the last escape hatch in the absence of institutions that should enrich people's personal life beyond the family.

This was the case until very recently in fact. The nuclear family is largely an abberation brought on by the commercialisation of what used to be the job of a village. David Brooks wrote an excellent piece on the development (in the US in particular) not long ago:

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2020/03/the-nuc...

The dysfunction you're speaking about is actually a result of that very same dynamic. Largely affluent upper-middle classes have replaced the extended family with professional services and shrunk the family unit down. It's poor people and minority communities who, lacking those resources, have suffered the most from the breakdown of the extended family.

That said, I've been living in a fairly urban 'burb with a nice downtown for almost 10 years. It's nice to actually have space to park a couple of cars and hang in your backyard amid some level of quiet.

My personal experience is that when you're younger, city life has its charms. When you find yourself full-on adulting with kids, the burbs (and Applebee's) actually sound pretty nice.

One won't be surprised by the spike in suicides a few years later...