Re:Ask HN: What are unintended consequences of new tech you'...
by tartoran on Saturday October 26, 2019 @10:25AM
(#21363849)
I and my wife are quite the opposite in many ways and came to the conclusion that shared interests is not absolutely needed for a life partner. It takes quite a while to discover that things you think are important aren’t so. I think the most important thing is understanding at a human level that we need in a partnership. Learn to accept supersitious types and see if theres other things beyond that. Its quite amazing to discover something that you’ve always believed was in fact wrong.
I've fallen for women who haven't fallen for me and vice versa . I don't feel like I'm looking for too attractive. In fact too attractive, as in model looking, is generally a turn off as I'm prejudice to believe they'll be high maintenance.
Rather I keep looking for a "soul mate" type and as an atheist science oriented geek, at least in my circles, it's hard to find my female counterpart. It's a selfish reason I wish there were more women in tech. Every job I've had has been 90-98% men. In general the women I meet are either spiritual/superstitious (believe in things I can't support as a partner) or they just have zero common interests. I'm not looking for a clone but I'd love to meet someone who can share a few passions more than just generic "travel" and "food" but they are few and far between.
I'm sure I am "self sabotaging" but "I found myself attracted quite often to people’s personalities such that I am totally blinded to what they look like" matches me to some extent. I can't say I'm totally blinded but it's definitely a huge attractive attribute, more than looks.