toopickydamit

I have this problem but I don't think it's so related to looks. Maybe it's where I live. I haven't had a real relationship in 16years (yes, no sex, no hugs, no kisses, no handholds, nothing. Was married short term a long time ago > 25yrs.

I've fallen for women who haven't fallen for me and vice versa . I don't feel like I'm looking for too attractive. In fact too attractive, as in model looking, is generally a turn off as I'm prejudice to believe they'll be high maintenance.

Rather I keep looking for a "soul mate" type and as an atheist science oriented geek, at least in my circles, it's hard to find my female counterpart. It's a selfish reason I wish there were more women in tech. Every job I've had has been 90-98% men. In general the women I meet are either spiritual/superstitious (believe in things I can't support as a partner) or they just have zero common interests. I'm not looking for a clone but I'd love to meet someone who can share a few passions more than just generic "travel" and "food" but they are few and far between.

I'm sure I am "self sabotaging" but "I found myself attracted quite often to people’s personalities such that I am totally blinded to what they look like" matches me to some extent. I can't say I'm totally blinded but it's definitely a huge attractive attribute, more than looks.