> If I had poo on my arm, I'd use soap and water to clean it then rinse well.

That is why the only acceptable option is using a bidet, with soap of course. It boggles my mind that some people can withstand even the thought of cleaning themselves with just paper or wet wipes.

Animals don't use toilet paper or bidets.

Animals don't have oversized glutes that allow them to stand upright, and run long distances to catch prey, and a high fat/carb, low fibre diet that most humans have.

Ever had an intelligent conversation with one?

>If I had poo on my arm, I'd use soap and water to clean it then rinse well.

This is the correct answer.

Baby wipes or go home.

Plumbing wasn't designed for them in most places. Most of them are not really "flushable" like they claim.

Thankfully we also invented rubbish bins to dispose of stuff instead of throwing it down our pipes.

That's because people use "face wipes" instead of "wet wipes" meant to be used for the bum.

Nope. At least from all the articles I have seen from different waste treatment plants in America. Those wipes that are advertised as flushable don't breakdown that much and they just end up getting pulled out at the waste treatment plant.

That's because you are not buying the right ones. Real biodegradable & flushable wipes are okay for waste treatment plants. You need to purchase those that do not contain any trace of plastic fibers.

If you are so worried about clogging anything, put them in the compost bin.

And then there are those of us on a septic system - "Septic safe" still causes issues.

And do not get me started on antibacterials... RID dosages to the rescue! (not necessarily a product endorsement).

No. Not really. flushable bum wipes are not really flushable.

What? You can't say "no" to an entire line of products. Simply make sure that you buy wipes that are flushable AND biodegradable. Flushable simply means that the wipe will make it out of your home. You also need to live in a country where there are rules in place stopping manufacturer from lying on the packets.

If they are made of, let's say, viscose rayon which is wood pulp (well, any compatible plant fiber) there's no reason why it would clog anything at the processing plant.

Edit: Well, it would also depend on how your local plant processes waste. Give them a call and ask them.

How is it possible to design a wipe that 1) does not disintegrate when wet inside its box and 2) disintegrates when wet in a sewage system?

Even Andrex's maximally biodegradable 'flushable washlets' offering contains 2% plastic fibers.

I'm not sure about which of the two is the best solution with regards to hemorrhoids but I use "wet toilet paper" in combination with normal (dry). Dry -> wet -> dry -> usually done. It works good enough for me, and I am pretty sure that a little bit of soap and water wouldn't make my hands clean if I had poo on them. Because when I wash my ass under the shower or in the morning, and it smells a bit like poo, that smell is hard to get rid of. The question is of course whether that's a problem from a hygiene PoV. From a smell PoV, I do not want to smell poo on my hands except from my newborn. That poo I don't mind.

> gentle spray of plain water

gentle, my eye. Here its usually forceful enough that it seems it would fountain out through my head. IMO way better than smearing things around and calling it clean.