Re:Who’s Sitting Next to You on the Subway? An R Train in Se...
by brailsafe on Sunday November 05, 2017 @01:07AM
(#15628368)
Having now spent some time in a proper city, I'm pretty well in agreement with this. Though I often find it's more of a shocking display less often than it's actually violent. It's a tough thing to pinpoint in people though. Is this person going to be violent or are they just dealing with a voice in their head? More often than not, when I've spoken with these people it's been an amicable interaction and they're just dealing with their situation. This would likely be different if I weren't trying to treat them as an equal—which they are—and instead attempting to give them "advice" or confronting them.
For those who think otherwise, try putting yourself in someone else's place. What would it be like if heroin was the only thing silencing the voice in your head telling you to kill yourself or others? What if the system that aids you alternative ways of dealing with that condition was non-existent? What if all those things are true, but also your family is dead or has abandoned you?
Re:Who’s Sitting Next to You on the Subway? An R Train in Se...
by perseusprime11 on Saturday November 04, 2017 @09:24PM
(#15627704)
I once tried to engage in a ‘Deepak Chopra’ way and asked if the person (15-17 year kid) needed any help, and started offering unsolicited advice about staying calm and being friendly to people. The situation escalated pretty quickly to the point he went crazy on the entire subway car and started using profanity against anyone who even looked at him. Note to myself: don’t engage. World is not the same as what you see in movies or tv shows.
Re:Who’s Sitting Next to You on the Subway? An R Train in Se...
by sdoering on Sunday November 05, 2017 @01:35AM
(#15628402)
I am generally on your side of the argument. Non the less. There is this voice inside my head that asks, if by not countering such antisocial behaviour we send the signal that this behaviour actually is ok.
When people learn that they get what they want by acting as assholes, why should they change?
In Germany we had a saying that it takes a whole village to raise a child. But these days if you tell a anti-social kid on the train to be more civil the parent tends to scold you.
Re:Who’s Sitting Next to You on the Subway? An R Train in Se...
by monktastic1 on Sunday November 05, 2017 @08:53AM
(#15629358)
If the group on the train could band together, show the kid some love, and actually help him, that would be amazing. Unfortunately, "countering" behavior in these situations often involves a kind of adversarial mentality that just pushes the real problem deeper. The same action taken out of love versus enmity can lead to vastly different outcomes.
That's really weird, best to just avoid and not engage.
EDIT: to anyone who thinks that by 'engaging you're going to help' I suggest you're probably wrong. Someone randomly punching others, staring at them and shouting profanities is not going to be 'convinced' of anything, especially in that state. Also I'll double down and say that anyone that does that has a problem that needs addressing. That is way outside the bounds of 'I'm having a bad day' or 'In a bad mood' or 'I was triggered' etc..