Works great when you're trying to keep a clear head at a party full of heavy drinkers too. Just make sure to take slow sips so that people don't catch you with an empty glass.

For social things along the lines of house parties, I'll bring my own cup. I bought a set of vintage tupperware cups, and, to my surprise, they're always a hit. Its silly, but it helps. I don't make a show of drinking water, and most people assume the cup is filled with beer. When people do ask what I'm drinking, and I tell them that its just water, my assumption is that their assumption is that I was / am an alcoholic... sometimes I let it slide, other times I will clarify.

Over these past few years I've moved away from everything but one cup of coffee per day, and about 2 - 3 litres of water.

Regarding the stigma, it may be a regional thing (Vancouver), but most people don't care about what I order at a restaurant or drink at a social function. The strangest look I'll get is when I order room temperature tap water... but that's understandable :)

Since moving away from everything else, I've found that I rarely crave sugar --- and when I do, everything is far too sweet for me. I used to have a notorious sweet-tooth, but moving away has cured me of that. I also can't handle fizzy things anymore, which was also surprising.

I think you might be right about that (Victorian here). No one ever cared what I was drinking in Victoria. Now that I'm in Europe it seems like people drink soda, beer or wine with every meal, even at home and they get weird when I ask for water. Like, they'll try to push soda or beer on me to the point where it gets uncomfortable if I say no. I'm still trying to figure a way to navigate around this, even as I slowly become acclimatized to drinking way more sugar and alcohol than I'm happy with.

I was pretty surprised when I'd realized this--G&T's had been my go-to "low-cal" cocktail for quite a while.

Ordering a club soda w/ lemon or lime however is a great move when avoiding alcohol in a social setting.

That stigma is entirely self-perception. No one cares or even notices what anyone else drinking.

That's when I learned that - much like smokers - drinkers were a tribe.

Coming soon to a state near you.

I don't know. It feels like vape pens is one of the least classy things going on at the moment. I think the only thing that can make "weed" acceptable and "classy" is some variation on fancy edibles (or perhaps drinkables to bring the discussion full circle)

Another unhealthy thing about drinking culture is how it stigmatises teetotallers as some moralising oppressers (thanks Prohibition), when they might just not want to feel like shit in the morning.

Maybe you're driving. Maybe you're on medication. Maybe if you're a woman you're trying to get pregnant (or already are).

Either this "if you don't drink you must be an alcoholic" thing is entirely American or lots of people on HN hang around with the wrong crowd.

EDIT: Also being "on call" is a good reason not to drink. Though if you need an excuse every time you go out with your friends, you deserve better friends.

I live in a suburban area in the U.S. and what you report is similar to what I've experienced, too.

It could also be that my social circle is older, and many of us are parents, so it's not as convenient to go out for a hard night's drinking.

But even when I'm out in town non-drinkers aren't bullied into drinking. If it's a party and they're not drinking (especially if they're men and thus pregnancy is off the table) someone will likely push them on it because it's uncommon but no more than vegetarians or anyone else with dietary restrictions.

However in that case "I don't drink because I don't like being drunk" or "I don't drink because I don't take it well" is a perfectly acceptable answer. Then again, a lot of the people I'm talking about are goths so straight edge / clean living isn't too uncommon.

Get better friends.

that said, some women become terrible (in more bad ways than good) when they get tipsy... including my current

This is also why some people say weird things like you're "cheap" if you don't order drinks (especially if you are paying).

Some care, but that's usually easy for me to get away from. They usually notice, and they usually go through the standard comments on it.

Wow this is insane. The culture I grew up in is famously health-friendly, so I've never come across this, but it sounds horrible.

I started drinking only water around high school, and the only reaction I ever got was "good for you, I wish I had that habit".

> Because something like this still costs money, it helps convince the purchaser that they aren't appearing to be "cheap" by only ordering water.

Interesting, you think that appearing cheap is behind the stigma? I would've guessed it would be something along the lines of anticipated reproach.

It's pretty easy to spot in people, and I go out of my way to avoid people that are that morally and intellectually stunted, so that may contribute to me seeing less of this reaction.

Personally I really don't care what anybody else consumes and I certainly don't look down on people for not drinking. People have lots of good reasons to abstain from drinking, and zero of those reasons are my business (unless they want to share)

--

I actually drink beer quite regularly, and whiskey when I am more in the mood (and in the money). (see: Canadian)

That said I rarely drink when I'm out with coworker, or I'll limit myself to a beer or two. I've never seen a real hard time from anybody, but I'm also a stubborn person when I feel the need to be. I wouldn't dream of giving anybody a hard time about not drinking and certainly would never look down on anybody for not partaking.

I think my only hope is that this view is reciprocated. I've found drinkers can just as often be condescended to for the indulgence -- and unless one really cuts loose and acts like an idiot, I think it's unwarranted and in poor taste... that it can be seen as an act of lower intelligence, or whatever you want.

Most of my friends are also healthy individuals and will also order water though, so maybe it's dependent on who your "friends" are.

I guess it's a question of company. If most of your friends order water, you feel a bit guilty ordering something less healthy.

A lot of food tastes are enhanced with alcohol like wine.

However, in my case, my schedule (and budget, and family factors) keep me from restaurants, except for an occasional lunch out at work. And then alcohol is verboten if I'm going back to work afterwards.