It's a zero sum game, of course. For each person who achieves their goals after stopping watching TV, someone else has theirs crushed.

In college my grades went down significantly when I started dating my future wife Sophomore year. I was a 4.0 Freshman year and only a 3.75 Sophomore year. Definitely causation...

Sorry, I know you're being tongue and cheek, it just made me think of the anecdote :)

One could argue that if I didn't start dating her and get married I would be much more "successful" right now.

Protip: When somebody brings up their wife leaving them and taking the kids, save the marital bliss talk for later.

I never said we were still together or blissful... in fact I said I would have probably been more successful if I didn't get married.

Although the thought hadn't crossed my mind I was being insensitive because I am 80% sure the OP post was a joke. Intentionally in stark contract with the article.

Hence why the other replies are:

> You should try stand-up comedy

> But did she take the truck?

(a joke reference to American Country Western Songs)

If I am wrong and his wife did leave him and take the dog my condolences.

You should try stand-up comedy

I'm sorry to hear that.

But did she take the truck?

Correlation...