I agree that much of this is unconscious bias. But it still grates.

I think it doesn't freeking matter. I don't even know WTF I am, but I don't expect everyone else to know, either.

But not that's not the case for many of us. We do know who we are, and an increasingly violent sect want us to bury it and pretend otherwise.

I do think it matters that people default to male. I wouldn’t want people to keep calling me “she” because I happen to be in a woman-dominated field. I understand why one would find this grating.