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Re:Ask HN: What breakthrough helped you build and maintain b... by beadey on Friday October 11, 2024 @01:12PM (#41811311)
Probably less than 50% of the time. So I’m in the “mostly rejected” category.
Re:Ask HN: What breakthrough helped you build and maintain b... by antisthenes on Friday October 11, 2024 @01:19PM (#41811374)
Less than 50% can be 45%.

If people agree to hang out with you 45% of the time, that's really great.

Most of my circle is busy enough that my personal rate is somewhere between 20% and 30%.

Try giving people a longer notice. Like maybe a full week instead of a couple of days. This should help them fit you into their schedule. People are just really busy these days.

It's not your fault.

Re:Ask HN: What breakthrough helped you build and maintain b... by hluska on Monday October 14, 2024 @02:40PM (#41840514)
Hey friend, sorry for taking so long to reply. Less than half is still really good, as the other commenter mentioned, try giving more lead time.

I think we’re kind of similar in that we are people who invite people places. That is our role. I look at this as being kind of like rbac - we have the role “organizer” which gives us access to the invite method.

If I were you, I’d stop worrying about reciprocation. Believe me, I know how hard that is because we’re kind of built to see reciprocation as success. But in this case, I worry that you’re trying to find problems that don’t exist.

Keep on inviting people out - you’re a good person, doing good work and you’re on the front lines fighting loneliness in other people. I don’t see an issue, in fact I just see a lot worth emulating.

If you ever get feedback that suggests the issue is you, feel free to write again. But I don’t see anything worth fixing, though I see a lot worth emulating.