the time i spend with my wife and kids is what matters. work is just a means to provide for them. in fact im currently not working because i quit my job for a while to spend time with them full time. this matters more to me than service health metrics and kpis

Awesome. I think your priorities are right. When it's time, I hope you can find work that provides both means for your family and personal satisfaction

Do something outside of work that matters

I don't disagree, but maybe both? Also do work that matters if you can... We only have so many trips around the sun