So so so much of this about. Not just disorders too.
You might read my comment as trying to claim that my disorders define me and that because I have these disorders I can afford to give up on this stuff because 'it's hopeless'. Truth is I've been trying to get past this for damn near a decade at this point and it's not nearly as easy as you make it out to be, and that's why I say that I don't have the same choice you think I do.
I didn't even know I had ADHD until a year or so ago, I'd just routinely lose the ability to do the stuff I love and I'd have to go find something else to do instead. Depression would stem from all the things I knew I loved but that I could no longer motivate myself to do. In fact I was probably even worse off before I knew about this because I thought that I was just doing something wrong, not being controlled by an invisible menace that most other people don't even know exists
I don't mean to be hostile or to impose that it can't be as easy as you're describing. I just don't think that it's right to say it's always just a choice how you react.
I have tons of completely involuntary reactions caused by primarily trauma, but I can't control them. They do things like force me literally out of consciousness with overwhelming guilt and/or sadness. That's not a choice. I didn't choose that. That's completely autonomous!`
It's an easy thing for people to say when they don't really want to help others.
What I posted is what I have personally found to be the most useful advice in overcoming self-destructive mental habits.
I'm glad a one-time, one-line quip worked for you, but in my experience, positive mental habits are built over time, through support and continuous practice.
That's making a lot of assumptions about my personal history that you couldn't possibly know anything about.
>but in my experience, positive mental habits are built over time, through support and continuous practice.
I agree, and I don't think anything I said implies otherwise.
If you are responding to people's problems with common one-liners, it can be interpreted as belittling someone. It could be interpreted as an attempt to over-simplify or attempt to make them feel they are "inferior" to see and solve their issues, when their issues are to them, much larger than a random one-line quip.
Why do people always say this / think that saying this is helpful? Try saying to someone with ADHD, "realize that you are choosing not to get your chores done today. You're choosing not to get out of bed on time. You're choosing to show behavior that your peers describe as 'lazy'. This will keep happening as long as you let it!"
So what if you have the ability to choose whether you are depressed or not? Not everyone got the same choice. Not everyone still has that choice.
I don't really expect another solution, but this always kind of bothers me when I see people saying everything is a choice.
With neurodivergence and mental disorders, what you see as "choice" can end up not being a choice at all.