How much Difficult to give and get honest feedback from people you know

Re:How much Difficult to give and get honest feedback from p... by nonrandomstring on Saturday December 30, 2023 @04:55AM (#38813999)

Great point about skills. You're absolutely right we can learn and hone these. Your experience of playing MTG with the kids, and discovering their powers sounds positive. Not quite the same level of sophistication but I played "Selfish" with 8-10 year olds and it boosted my feelings about what is "innate" human nature. I think we have to learn to be mean and nasty, and to prefer tit-for-tat over forgiveness.

As for people having always been de-socialised, yes I am sure it's always been so for some, but something has changed. I'm also old enough to have traced it. What's changed imho is acceptability. It's great that we're a more tolerant society etc. But we used to value good manners, Today I think we see them as a weakness and treat assholes as if their behaviour was quite acceptable but "unfortunate". I think digital technology has played a large part in that.

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Re:How much Difficult to give and get honest feedback from p... by maxrf on Saturday December 30, 2023 @06:02PM (#38820156)

Thanks, and agree it can feel 'mean and nasty' to disagree online - and that in-person politeness would help - yes, people will post things they wouldn't say.

PG has a take on why HN is more civil tl;dr 'it's behaviour not people' - in: 'dilution' at paulgraham dot com hackernews html

Thanks for the reply - appreciated.

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