This is definitely a tricky venue to get into, but the prestige still makes submissions worth it.

I was told my submission is pending approval - anxiously waiting.

I love the motto on the crest.

Latin translation via Google Translate: "certain rejection at an uncertain hour"

Which is a parody of the old cliche "Mors certa, hora incerta": Death is certain, but nobody knows when.

I heard rumors that Chuck Norris actually had the Journal of Universal Rejection accept his manuscript.

He then rejected their acceptance which is why all issues are still empty.

Jeff Dean is the only person to have actually published in it. It was just before they started tracking entries.

he roundhoused the acceptance letter.

Surely more credible than the ones entirely created for political posturing.

The Predatory Journals Lists are so large now it is an area of study unto itself. =)

It's in fact the most credible journal (by acceptance rate)

All papers that it has accepted have been unimpeachable.

All papers that it has accepted have been guilty of academic fraud.

Is this the world's most credible journal, or the most notorious one?

It all depends on whether the present king of France is bald https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Definite_description

Bobby Tables submission was lost.

When did CVPR change its name?

It's only sad they dont sell paper version of their archives

They don't sell the paper version directly, but you can get it in reams from any office supply store.