It's unpopular because it's bad.
> By getting rid of the 'E' part of the bike, you'll get more exercise and won't have to worry about theft.
I'm not sure where you live but this is fantasy. All bikes are targets. Bicycle theft is a sport for some people.
> Seriously bikes are so ridiculously efficient why do we need to add batteries and motors and geegaws to them?
Because hills exist. The nearest grocery store is ~1.5 miles and 312 feet up from here, in direct sunlight. I ride every day and there's no way I could climb that hill without breaking a full-on red-in-the-face dripping-workout sweat. Especially in the summer. I'd like to see you tackle that on a beater single speed. Don't forget the two bags of ice and the charcoal.
I rented e-bikes to show relatives around, and they're fantastic if you can't or won't exercise that day. Sometimes it can make the difference between taking the bike or the car.
I see so many people on e-bikes that wouldn't ride a bicycle at all otherwise, and I think "good for them".
If you’re reasonably fit, or only use your normal bike on routes you are confident you can ride at your fitness level, then do that with a normal bike.
E-bikes will however free you from doubting you can achieve whatever is in front of you, and that removes a powerful barrier that prevent a lot of people from using bikes at all.
I see lots of elderly people and people of all shapes travelling long distances on e-bikes.
Maybe you don’t get 100% of the benefits of human-powered travel, but if you use the assistance sparingly, you easily get 70-80% of the benefit.
I set le lowest level of assistance of mine to only 15%. Helps me lug the 60lbs of stuff I carry with me on my journeys and I still get a good cardio pushing myself, riding a few hours a day.
I do use a normal bike sometimes, and prefer them for agility and for the pleasure of feeling lighter, but my e-bike is taking me farther and faster (and I’ve lost 15lbs since last year and never felt better in my life than I do now).
Generally on my way to the office I don't want to get all sweaty and have to use the showers, so point two for the ebike. I can use higher pedal assist or lean on the throttle a bit more on the way to work and arrive fresh. On the way home I can turn down/off the pedal assist and ignore the throttle as much as possible to start acclimating myself to a truer bicycle commute.
Incidentally, I also custom built a “mini velo” similar to the author’s “orange city bomber.” It really is the best bicycle for urban environments, pure fun, no idea why they aren’t more popular in the states.
Ride a regular bike.
In terms of theft, just use a beater bike for commuting.
By getting rid of the 'E' part of the bike, you'll get more exercise and won't have to worry about theft.
For years I rode a beater that I found in the garbage and that I fixed up with some parts I had lying around. Later I upgraded to a singlespeed because derailleurs freeze up in the winter.
It's a trek earl. Seriously bikes are so ridiculously efficient why do we need to add batteries and motors and geegaws to them?