Don’t worry, enterprise Java programming patters will fix that “performance” thing right up. Call a function? Goodness no, not without an helper class being instantiated first. Oh you wanted to instantiate a helper class? Better call a factory to do that. Not directly - have you heard of Dependency Injection? We configure that via XML here.

See? Fast performance isn’t a problem any more. You can make it go away in the time it takes you to load Jira.

JVM startup time is how it got that reputation, I'm guessing benchmarks tend to exclude that.

Back in the early/mid 2000s, Java-based applications often had a Java splashscreen as it loaded, so even non-technical people made the association.