though part of the issue is “I disagree because Y” is not relevant because it’s an opinion with no negative effect on those who disagree (as opposed to say opinions on very factual science). So “I disagree because Y” is implicitly a rebuttal.

Instead , the subtly different “I see where you’re coming from however for me Y” is not a rebuttal. It’s an acceptance that two views may exist simultaneously and be equally valid.

If you look at the responses of the person I responded to, they’re always in the form of “well I need this so it makes no sense”

Note that they never acknowledge that others may not have the same needs or views. There’s an absolute way in all the interactions I’ve had with them.

The simple act of accepting another’s perspective changes the post from a negation to something that builds upon it.