Where have you been? We've been trying FOREVER to find a good person for this role. You should have been working here years ago!
"I applied like 6 times. Nobody ever called me back."
ATS system: "Candidate does not have staff software enginer for 5 years of job titles + doesn't have 'SQL' and 'HTML' listed in their skills section" = /dev/null
HR recruiter: I don't want to actually have to look through all of these resumes to find "close" matches.
HR recruiter: No
I estimate how long I am willing to go without a job. for the first half of that time, I'm a sniper, applying for dream jobs. If I haven't landed one by the time the second half begins, I start going shotgun.
While it stinks to feel like you've done worse going for jobs that you really care about, it helps to remind yourself that all companies have communication/social problems that will impede your work. No company is really all that special.
Always send a polite response to recruiters (but scripted). Asking for more info about the job, and concrete comp numbers. Serious recruiters won't hesitate to give it out (keep in mind they get a portion of it!). Body shops won't share that info but at this point it's ok to ignore them.
Shotgun approach - figure out what software speciality and industry you want (for me, it's Data Engineering in Biotech/anything life sciences), and apply to every single job that you seem fit for. I applied to 20, heard back from 2-3.
Sniper approach - if you find a job that you actually really want, work your network as hard as you can. Find a friend who is connected with the company, ask them to make an introduction. Find random people at the company, LinkedIn message the hiring manager, do anything you can to get an interview. Once you get an interview, you have a chance, but the hard part is getting the interview.