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Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by eli on Thursday January 19, 2023 @07:01PM (#34447418)
I wish everyone was just named James. I had a good friend named James and it’s much easier to call everyone that than to learn a bunch of individual names.
Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by recursive on Thursday January 19, 2023 @07:05PM (#34447449)
It makes sense to me that individuals should have names. Pronouns tend to be much less information dense, and are used as shorthand. It doesn't make sense to me that pronouns should capture gender, as opposed to hair color, height, or age.
Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by CobrastanJorji on Thursday January 19, 2023 @07:46PM (#34447751)
If we could simply convince the entire world to speak either Persian or Bengali, we could avoid the whole problem.
Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by munificent on Thursday January 19, 2023 @07:50PM (#34447776)
The property that pronouns capture is essentially arbitrary. That's why Romance languages assign gender to stuff like telephones and sandwiches.

The point of gendered pronouns is that sentences very often have two nouns: a subject and object. If you have only a single pronoun, then any sentence can only use a pronoun to unambiguously refer to one of those. If you have two pronouns and you randomly and evenly distribute them across various subjects, then it's fairly likely that the subject and object will get difference ones and you can now unambiguously use pronouns for both.

Since a very large fraction of human speech pertains to other humans and since human sex is a roughly 50/50 distribution, it makes some sense that we used gender as our mostly arbitrary thing to assign a pair of pronouns too. We could have used, say handedness instead, but with only ~10% of people being left-handed, the odds of a sentence being about a righty and a lefty is much smaller.

Pronouns are basically like special variables in a REPL that let you refer to the most recent expression. It's nice if you can refer back to a couple of them.

Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by jimmywetnips on Friday January 20, 2023 @11:57PM (#34464028)
Why even use articles or pronouns, a better way would be to unambiguously mark every word with whether they're the object subject or whatever role it is in the sentence. Maybe tack on more flags as you need them for more information as needed

Hence why forcing my team to learn Hungarian has really been a no brainer and will really start to pay dividends in the next decade when we finally reach a working professional proficiency

Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by munificent on Saturday January 21, 2023 @04:08PM (#34470548)
> mark every word with whether they're the object subject or whatever role it is in the sentence

No, that's not the point. (Most languages do make subject/object fairly clear.)

The point of pronouns is to have a short alias to refer to a previously introduced noun.

Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by burnished on Thursday January 19, 2023 @08:55PM (#34448249)
Well, it certainly is a much stronger disambiguater than those other signals. Dividing a population in half is a pretty powerful technique.

Though now that I think about it age is also potent - you get the same rough division w.r.t relative age (younger vs older than the speaker), and you can divide the population roughly into quarters with ease and accuracy. Do miss and ma'am count as pronouns here? They code for age as well as gender

Hair color and height dont really have the same sort of dividing power broadly speaking.

Still, your line of thought there about what a pronoun should capture is intriguing.

Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by ectopod on Thursday January 19, 2023 @07:14PM (#34447513)
The whole point of pronouns is to reduce cognitive overhead. If pronouns become something you have to remember for each person then you might as well drop them from the language and use names all the time.
Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by ccn0p on Thursday January 19, 2023 @07:31PM (#34447634)
Totally. Or use X for everyone. No overloading of common words well understood to be something completely different.
Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by eli on Thursday January 19, 2023 @07:40PM (#34447712)
Yes exactly: James for everyone.

Some people may prefer a different name but I think they’ll understand once we explain the cognitive load.

Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by mkaic on Friday January 20, 2023 @12:45PM (#34456763)
James thinks James meant "James'll understand" instead of "they'll understand" :P
[dead]
Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by cldellow on Thursday January 19, 2023 @07:36PM (#34447678)
> suffering

> cynical user of a tool of coercive soft-power

> weapon masquerading as a new morality

Take with a grain of salt, but I feel like you have stronger emotions on this issue than the trans and non-binary people I know.

Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by verall on Thursday January 19, 2023 @07:32PM (#34447643)
> I don't respect people's pronoun preferences because that would be creating reasons to hate people

This has got to be peak hacker news

Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by wpietri on Thursday January 19, 2023 @07:49PM (#34447767)
At least it got flagged! But since I can't reply to it and put some effort into typing a reply, I hope you don't mind me dropping it below.

---

What? I agree that for my tastes a lot of people take gender very seriously. But it seems wild to me to think this is somehow a new phenomenon.

For millennia in many societies one's society-assigned gender determined a great deal about one's status, including what work you could do, what work you could do, and what sort of violence against you was acceptable. And in a lot of times and places, misgendering somebody was used as a deliberate insult and could even be seen as "fighting words", legitimate legal cause for violence.

The only thing that has changed lately is a bit of individual freedom in picking that role for one's self. For those people, many consider it rude to ignore their choices, partly because of the history of gender, but partly because those people are targets of bigotry and violence. There's a whole list! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_people_killed_for_bein...

All moral codes have a "coercive" element to them, just like all legal codes do. If you're going to be rude, people may, gasp, say something about it. You trying to establish a different coercive moral code against that isn't somehow better. And getting all het up about it in this specific case, instead of all the other codes of politeness, suggests it's not really "coercive" morality you care about.

Personally, it seems to me that trans folks have a pretty hard role in life. They always did, but now at least they're getting to be open about it. I'm glad to support them in that; calling them how they want to be called seems like literally the least I could do. Indeed, as a thoroughgoing nerd, I spent a lot of my childhood getting shit on for being different, so I'm happy to help make space for different kinds of difference.

Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by javajosh on Thursday January 19, 2023 @08:02PM (#34447855)
>At least it got flagged!

Ah yes, censorship is good when it is an opinion you do not share, right? That I was flagged is wrong on the part of hacker news, and whoever got that ball rolling.

>All moral codes have a "coercive" element to them

Coercion is good too. Are you sure you're not the baddie here? Are you really sure?

>as a thoroughgoing nerd, I spent a lot of my childhood getting shit on for being different, so I'm happy to help make space for different kinds of difference.

Another popular strawman. I stated explicitly "live how you want" and yet you assert that I'm against difference or outcasts. You lied.

>trans folks have a pretty hard role in life

I'm speaking specifically of custom pronouns. If you cut off your junk and wear a dress, I think its rude not to call you "she". It is a shitty kind of idea that encourages people to introduce new error modes into their relationships, and the bitter irony is you think you're doing people a favor by doing that.

Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by bavent on Thursday January 19, 2023 @08:18PM (#34447983)
People disagreeing with you is not censorship. We can all still see your comment.
Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by wholinator2 on Thursday January 19, 2023 @08:27PM (#34448058)
I don't want to involve myself in this argument but I will say that I can not see their original post. It displays as just "[flagged]" for me. I don't know if that's the app I'm using or what, but I cannot see the post.
Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by bavent on Thursday January 19, 2023 @08:29PM (#34448074)
Really? I see the "[flagged]", and the post, it's just slightly dimmer and I had to manually open it. I'm using no special extensions or anything, just a normal browser.
Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by cldellow on Thursday January 19, 2023 @08:45PM (#34448186)
There is a stage past [flagged] where a post can also be [dead].

You only see dead posts if you have showdead=yes in your settings.

So you may have seen their comment before it was killed, or you may have showdead=yes in your settings.

Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by howinteresting on Thursday January 19, 2023 @09:16PM (#34448385)
Going back to your original post:

>Anyone who doesn't have the capacity to accept being called any pronoun has a mental health problem.

By this metric the vast majority of humanity has a mental health problem, and you're an exception. Most cis, het men do not like to be called she or a girl.

Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by wpietri on Thursday January 19, 2023 @09:23PM (#34448437)
Yeah, that's pretty special. Personally as a cis nerd, I find the neurotypical obsession with gender roles pretty weird. I think we would be healthier if there were less of it, and like that we seem to be heading that way. But I don't think that makes everybody mentally ill.
Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by howinteresting on Friday January 20, 2023 @03:29PM (#34459409)
Worth drawing a distinction between gender roles, which are mostly "socially constructed", and gender identity, which is someone's inherent sense of their gender (with a strong biological component).

Gender identity is an essential part of what makes us human. Some people have a stronger sense of it than others. To the extent that mental illness describes an actual objective thing, having a gender identity does not make someone mentally ill, because it doesn't by itself disrupt one's healthy functioning in society. It is when that gender identity is invalidated by others that it can affect people's mental health (just like calling someone a slur or insulting them can affect their mental health). It is still not an illness, though.

Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by wpietri on Thursday January 19, 2023 @09:20PM (#34448423)
It looks like you posted a strident reply and then replaced it with something anodyne. Given that people have already replied, that strikes me as both rude and confusing. Just so everybody knows the edit history, here is your original comment:

----

>At least it got flagged!

Ah yes, censorship is good when it is an opinion you do not share, right? That I was flagged is wrong on the part of hacker news, and whoever got that ball rolling.

>All moral codes have a "coercive" element to them

Coercion is good too. Are you sure you're not the baddie here? Are you really sure?

>as a thoroughgoing nerd, I spent a lot of my childhood getting shit on for being different, so I'm happy to help make space for different kinds of difference.

Another popular strawman. I stated explicitly "live how you want" and yet you assert that I'm against difference or outcasts. You lied.

>trans folks have a pretty hard role in life

I'm speaking specifically of custom pronouns. If you cut off your junk and wear a dress, I think its rude not to call you "she". It is a shitty kind of idea that encourages people to introduce new error modes into their relationships, and the bitter irony is you think you're doing people a favor by doing that.

Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by dangerlibrary on Thursday January 19, 2023 @07:32PM (#34447639)
I don't disagree with you in principle, but this take ignores the boots-on-the-ground reality for trans and nonbinary people.

Trans and nonbinary people are using this as a shibboleth to determine whether they can feel safe around you. You are not someone who wishes nonbinary or trans people harm, but unfortunately, there is a large segment of the population that does. The act of using someone's preferred pronouns is an act of saying "you are safe with me, I do not wish you harm." This is not a default or automatic assumption they can make, as it likely is for you.

Many trans and nonbinary people, through no fault of their own, have PTSD from how they've been treated by others. Even those that have not experienced hatred or violence directly are no doubt aware of the statistics.[0] You're correct that, in many cases, this is a mental health problem. It's an accommodation for a colleague or friend that needs your help, for now.

[0] https://time.com/3999348/transgender-murders-2015/

Re:how to completely own an airline in 3 easy steps by wpietri on Thursday January 19, 2023 @07:52PM (#34447791)
Yeah, I have trans friends and former colleagues, and can confirm all of this. I'd love to live in a world where it wasn't controversial or dangerous, but we are not in that world yet.