> Unlike other auto-wipers I've used in the past, the wipers on my Telsa Model Y are fantastic. By that mean, in nearly a year of driving, I've never once manually adjusted the wiper speed (or even thought about it)

I disagree. Dirty windshields and worn out blades often make them act erratically. Anyone who lives in a snowy climate knows how salty roads instantly cover your windshield and turn it into an opaque screen without constantly spraying it. I've seen them turn on just because the windshield was dirty, there wasn't even water on the windshield.

Here's a pretty ridiculous video of some guys showing how the wipers will turn on for just about any kind of obstruction of the camera. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0SSYFMtdJ5k