It's absurd that the devices they make you have to sit in front of to use, the laptops and iMac have TouchID yet the devices you can use laying beside you in bed, on a table or rotated have FaceID.

Sure, I definitely agree that these situations can be problems. As a counterpoint, as in my GP comment, the devices with FaceID are also the ones at which I'm least likely to have clean and available hands. For instance, I might be cooking with hands covered in wet dough, I might be wearing gloves due to the cold, my hands might be wet from rain, or my hands might be dry due in part to winter.

How good are those under-the-display sensors from a security standpoint? If Apple had a blunder like that Samsung fingerprint reader that was fooled by a gel phone case they'd never live it down, meanwhile nobody really cares about the security level of Android phones (IIRC there are no Android phones with an actually secure face unlock, the random spot IR blaster is one reason that Apple can't get rid of the notch like Android phones can)

This is fair. I doubt most Android phone's fingerprint sensor isn't secure as iPhone. Still Apple sell iPad and MacBook with TouchID so they can implement them for iPhone without degrading security.

The current iPhone SE (2nd generation, 2020) has TouchID, so there doesn't seem to be a higher threshold of biometric security required by Apple as compared to similar Android brands. There are also Android phones that still offer standard (not in-display) fingerprint sensors.

Yeah there should be nothing (but cost/supply) prohibiting them from implementing the power button touch sensor that the iPads have.

The Pixel 4 has actual IR-based facial recognition, which is why it has a top bezel. I’m indifferent between that and the notch chosen by Apple, having owned both.

It makes sense that Google would bother to do it right! Thanks for the correction.

Certainly. As I said, it seems like a false dichotomy perhaps dictated by cost, and Android manufacturers are also guilty of this in transitioning to fingerprints only (in-display or otherwise) on many newer models.