This sounds hopelessly inconsistent to me. Why should I hold myself to a different standard than I hold other people to? If acknowledging inequality elsewhere is required to be kind to other people, that means that ignoring inequality when it affects me is being unkind to myself.
If you assume you can’t do something you definitely won’t. If you assume you can, you may not succeed; you may be blocked by some external cause, but not by something you could have controlled.
In the case of helping others, you may play a role in clearing an obstacle that, not withstanding their own effort and belief, would have blocked them.
In both cases you are assuming you have power. Power to help yourself and power to reduce inequality by empowering others.
This isn’t a contradiction.
I don't tolerate inequality, but I do know it exists. It will continue to exist if we don't fight it.
Put another way. Ignore inequality as it effects you, assume you can overcome it. But acknowledge its existence with respect to others and do everything in your power to create equality.