For what it's worth, not all partners demand diamonds! We deemed a _very_ modest ring and paying off more student debt as the more reasonable option.

I also think this is a US thing. In other countries a ring without diamond is also normal.

And I guess most people could not even distinct a diamond from polished glass.

Speaking of US things, what's an engagement ring? :)

And yes, most wedding rings around here are plain gold. I only know one couple with diamonds on their wedding rings and they're kinda nouveau riche and snobby.

We're American, but living in Ireland, and when my wife announced she was engaged her colleagues demanded to see her ring, oddly. Cultural imperialism I suppose.

Engagement rings are as much a thing in Europe as wedding rings, they just don't automatically include big diamonds.

perhaps you should watch the video and read the article. It literally states several times it has nothing to do with the advancement in the manufacturing of the type of diamonds people wear as jewelry, but, rather the type used in industry for cutting.

While you are correct, there is no need to be snarky. One of the guidelines states that:

> Please don't comment on whether someone read an article. "Did you even read the article? It mentions that" can be shortened to "The article mentions that."

It might for diamonds, but many women will still want something expensive "just so that the man will prove that she matters to him by buying her something", which is sad.

Women will either move to more expensive diamonds or request something else. Business opportunity for someone with good PR just like how diamonds were pure PR and before that no-one was using them.

I think this is not sad, they are free to demand whatever they want, like you are free to accept that.

In fact, it is not a very good idea to accept that. You will be labeled instantly as "provider", not as a "lover".

Most women that have "providers" also have "lovers" and usually it is not the same person.

That is a lesson that I learned long time ago, when I met a very successful with women man, that actually treated them very badly. He had the mentality that it were women the ones that should prove their value to him.

Over the years I met other people with the same mindset, and even started applying it somewhat myself. I am physically attractive and educated, but I also was for some time too much polite with women, putting them on a pedestal for being successful with them.

The most attractive thing for women is character strength. Also things like being a world traveler helps a lot. You can be penniless, if you have those two things, attracting all the women you want is no problem.

Demand for diamonds isn't driven by gender. There are just as many men who want to show off that they can afford a big shiny rock than there are women who want their partner to buy them a big shiny rock.

It's not that much showing off as it is the fear that the woman won't be pleased with a cheap option.

For some, sure. For others it is absolutely about showing off.

Two sides of the same coin. Insecurities and fear.

Women have been sold on the idea from a very young age that they need a fairy tale wedding to live happily ever after: from toys to tv, from books to movies: the kneeling groom to be with the shiny ring and the large, grand wedding with a dozen bridesmaids. There are multiple industries selling this vision.

Reducing that to "but many women will still want something expensive "just so that the man will prove that she matters to him by buying her something"" .... this is pure sexism.

Not sure what you mean by sexism.

But there are differences in the sexes with regards to the process of conceiving and rearing a child. And it seems to me that a big part of our social constructs that were developed to deal with those differences can be reduced to "the man doing something expensive and hard to fake". Which isn't really that different from "the man proving she matters to him by buying something".

A dowry is a social construct not a "difference in the sexes"

And there are plenty of women who find this custom distasteful. Some women want a wedding which displays opulence and in which they are treated like a princess. Others want one which more implies the equality of the wedding partners in responsibility and capability. Others want a humorous circus or something that emphasizes the roles of their community in their future lives. Many don't want to start their married life, or any stage of life, with a financial setback.

Oh, agreed. I'm just saying what the social environment is. The environment boys grow up in is just as toxic, if not more so, for entirely different reasons.

It would be better if they replaced the ugly rock with something prettier and then used the saved money on something that actually keeps its value like gold.