I moved from the US and every city I went to was really inclusive, but I can be biased because I socialized with churchgoers (where inclusion of outsiders is their responsibility). This is based on a fairly large sample size: Houston, Austin, Menlo Park, New York, and LA for ~10 year period. This subset is completely different in Vancouver though: the cliqueness, especially in Chinese speaking communities, is prevalent- I just gave up after 2 years and ~5-10 churches. Btw, I am Asian and know fluent Chinese...

Holy. I’m sorry to hear it.

I say as a born and raised Vancouverite, since moved to the US... it’s kinda fucked out there.

As someone born here, it feels the same way to me. Basically my entire social circle is just people who are also born here.

You basically have to marry into this social group, and none of us really seem to mind.

That said, people also form groups around activities (like knitting circles, various sports, and what not).

>>You basically have to marry into this social group, and _none of us really seem to mind_.

Can confirm. Vancouver is a completely difference experience when you have friends/family that actively introduce you as a trusted vertex into their pre-existing social graphs. It feels like a social-stakes version of the "Sand Hill Road warm intros" game.

Sounds like London. Lots of people friends with people they knew from their home towns who also moved in. Any time I went to an expat event there, people complaining they never made any British friends.

My brother spent two years in London — nearly all of his friends were either other aussies or from other countries, modulo a few friendly brits: and he ran a pub for those two years!