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Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by 3pt14159 on Wednesday December 29, 2010 @11:49PM (#2051255)
This post depresses me. I'm a man and certainly no feminist, but posts on the usefulness of attractive, female RoR developers leaves a really bad taste in my mouth. I was going to comment on the nature of our field, but it's probably the same almost everywhere, from banking to bricklaying to hacking.

I'll be in my terminal.

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by brandnewlow on Thursday December 30, 2010 @12:01AM (#2051277)
That's how the world works. Deal with it.

I have a friend who works in the call center at a day trading firm in Chicago. He's a sailor and the owner/founder of the firm has a boat so he gets long stretches of unfiltered time with the guy outside of work. The guy regularly affirms that they intentionally try to hire only HRI's ("hot russian immigrants") when they hire women because it boosts morale, makes hiring ambitious men easier and apparently exploits a small dip in the local hiring pool where the the immigrant women have a slightly harder time getting jobs at most places than the non-immigrant hotties they go up against elsewhere. My friend's firm found that going the extra mile to help them with visa status stuff meant they could get better looking women on staff than their competition.

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by kabuks on Thursday December 30, 2010 @12:16AM (#2051315)
> That's how the world works. Deal with it.

Really?

When I see any argument start with this sentence, I immediately mistrust it. I suspect that world works in mysterious, complex, and ever changing ways, and that I get to be a part of shaping it.

I prefer:

"That's how things seem to be going right now. If you don't like it, there are probably others out there who feel the same. You could work with them to make it a little better. As you're working folks will tell you to just deal with it. Smile politely, ignore their advice, and keep working."

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by sliverstorm on Thursday December 30, 2010 @12:25AM (#2051334)
I think you're being blindly optomistic. The only way to "make it a little better" is to:

a: make it so that ANYBODY can get a hot woman, which makes having lots of hot women about useless

b: flood the industry with women. This is happening slowly, but you can't force it. Of course, if the balance tips towards women, then we'll just have the opposite, and having hot powerful handsome men around will replace hot women.

c: (myriad of ridiculous examples about fundamentally changing our species and the nature of sexuality)

You have to remember this isn't about sexism. It may well be sexist, but all it's about is having what all of your peers want but can't have makes you look powerful. It just so happens the most common want-but-can't-have is attractive women. "making it better" can only be achieved my removing the want.

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by readymade on Thursday December 30, 2010 @12:52AM (#2051405)
Slavery wasn't about racism, it was about cheap, unregulated labor. Pure economics. It doesn't absolve the moral dilemma inherent to it, or negate the racism that frequently underpinned public support for it. For what it's worth I'm sure people defended human slavery by saying "that's just the way the world works" then as well. You're not ethically tantamount to a slave owner by glibly justifying using women as ornaments or pawns in your little networking game, but it's a bit troubling that "treating women with the same respect you'd expect from your peers" doesn't factor into your assessment.
Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by sliverstorm on Thursday December 30, 2010 @01:09AM (#2051440)
If you treat them and see them like pawns, then shame on you. (though odds are if you see them like pawns, you see everybody as a pawn, female or not. An equal-opportunity exploiter, if you will).

Still, I'd observe this is tied to basic human nature & sexuality. Unlike slavery, as best I can tell it cannot be done away with, short of making it illegal for a man to have a hot woman/entourage of women present (totally not a sexist law, btw)

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by readymade on Thursday December 30, 2010 @01:48AM (#2051531)
Fair enough, but one can justify racism and ethnocentrism by appealing to our animal instincts as well – we may very well be predisposed to seeking power over others and reserving trust for those we perceive to be our own kind. Now granted, I have no way of proving that there isn't some kind of misogyny gene. But legally, slavery was done away with by passing a constitutional amendment that makes no direct reference to race. Culturally, there was a large precedent of underground and increasingly popular outrage against the practice, founded in principles of human equality that had to be actively argued for.

I bring up the parallel, again, not because it's an equivalent situation, but to illustrate what I think is a common ethical trap we can fall into: what good is it to see an injustice and wave our hands, saying that it's just the way the things are?

You suggested that the grandposter is blindly optimistic for wanting to change the way men relate to women in the workplace (or something like that), but think about how much has changed culturally, that we can have this conversation in 2010 and have it be basically a given that human bondage is morally wrong? It took a law in 1865, and it was controversial at the time. Today you have to be on the fringe of society in order to believe that it was ever morally defensible, presumably. That's not a triumph of law, it's a triumph of active social change.

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by sliverstorm on Thursday December 30, 2010 @01:58AM (#2051554)
I had typed out a long and careful argument, but I think I'll just leave it at this:

I believe this issue is fundamentally rooted in sexuality, and I am deeply, deeply fearful of the day we attempt to legislate the nature of sexuality.

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by readymade on Thursday December 30, 2010 @02:05AM (#2051570)
On the latter point I agree with you, and I'm certainly not advocating that, merely suggesting we can do a lot more on our own to be agents of social change with the force of our moral convictions than would otherwise seem possible.

As for the question of our fundamental nature, we'll just have to leave it up to the philosophers. I appreciate your good natured debate, nonetheless.

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by svv on Thursday December 30, 2010 @08:04AM (#2052093)
Slavery wasn't about pure economics. In fact, it is not that obvious that slave labour is more efficient from the purely economical point. There're problems with incentives, with hiring staff willing to manage the slaves, controlling abuse etc. Such critique was known at least since Adam Smith.

To take a more modern example, the same is true about compulsory military service. Many people once believed and many still believe that conscription is simply way cheaper than voluntary military service. However, the people that are drafted into the military service could instead have been involved in the productive work in the regular economy, and paying taxes that may be used to pay volunteers.

In short, "pure economics" doesn't automatically go in favour of slavery.

Slavery was a sustainable institution not just because it was perceived as cost-efficient. It required general acceptance of the idea that it's OK to deny certain classes of people -- e.g., according to their origin -- their basic rights. And that is pretty much about racism.

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by JoeAltmaier on Saturday January 01, 2011 @10:48AM (#2057743)
I don't think a million years of sexual selection is going to be overcome by clever arguments. Any sensible, workable path forward just has to include accepting that men and women have strong urges to treat one another differently.
Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by brandnewlow on Thursday December 30, 2010 @01:48AM (#2051530)
Strawman argument is straw-like.
Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by readymade on Thursday December 30, 2010 @02:02AM (#2051564)
Elaborate.
Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by brandnewlow on Thursday December 30, 2010 @02:45AM (#2051645)
Me: "This is how the world works."

You: "Slavery is a terrible thing."

Yes, I agree with your statement, but it went way beyond anything we're actually talking with in order to elicit agreement from readers. You characterized the previous comment as being pro-slavery, hence creating a strawman argument.

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by mkramlich on Thursday December 30, 2010 @02:41AM (#2051635)
> You have to remember this isn't about sexism.

Agreed. Many folks confuse sex/sexuality with sexism. Sex != Sexism. Just as "not liking to hang out with gays" is not (necessarily) homophobia. You can not like a thing, or think it's unhealthy, even if you don't think it's a morally wrong or evil thing. Important distinction that people trip on all the time.

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by brandnewlow on Thursday December 30, 2010 @03:20AM (#2051712)
It's actually about respecting the fact that women are great judges of men. They're designed to be super discerning. So if a high-value woman singles out a guy as worth her time, it's a safe bet that he's worth your time, too.
Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by JonnieCache on Thursday December 30, 2010 @08:24AM (#2052115)
>the fact that women are great judges of men

I'm assuming that by great you mean better than men are of women. What evidence do you have for this, apart from the dubious[1] field of evolutionary psychology? Also, could you define your terms better? What aspects of men are women great at judging? They are, after all, not psychic.

[1] http://www.badscience.net/category/evolutionary-psychology/

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by Waywocket on Thursday December 30, 2010 @09:14AM (#2052205)
>t's actually about respecting the fact that women are great judges of men. They're designed to be super discerning. So if a high-value woman singles out a guy as worth her time, it's a safe bet that he's worth your time, too.

What? Women are terrible judges of men. Probably even worse than men are.

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by jdp23 on Thursday December 30, 2010 @10:20AM (#2052363)
> You have to remember this isn't about sexism. It may well be sexist ...

i.e., it's about sexism. what is it about the subject that makes otherwise-logical people say things like this?

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by kateray on Thursday December 30, 2010 @02:00AM (#2051561)
In that case, I'll go for option b. But validating the attitude that hot techie-women should be paraded around as spectacles performing for the benefit of their men is not going to help us get there.
Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by brandnewlow on Thursday December 30, 2010 @02:56AM (#2051663)
No one should be paraded around as anything.

I argued that it is a fact that if you walk into an event with a cute girl on your arm. You will be treated differently by men AND women than if you walk into the event without a cute girl on your arm. This is how the world works.

It's why some people are streaky daters. When they've been single for awhile, they're always walking into rooms alone. But when they get some momentum going, men and women take notice and show more interest in that person, which can lead to more dating opportunities.

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by jdp23 on Thursday December 30, 2010 @01:18AM (#2051457)
Yeah really. And this particularly applies to guys justifying sexism by saying "that's how the world works". If you're not doing anything to change it, that's part of the problem.
Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by brandnewlow on Thursday December 30, 2010 @02:58AM (#2051670)
There are many more important things to change in the world than the fact that men are impressed by a guy who is accompanied by an attractive female. I don't get how it's evil to point this out. It's not a pleasant reality, but neither is death, the odds of being in a car crash, the unemployment figures these days...i.e. all just statements of facts, neither good nor evil.
Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by kabuks on Thursday December 30, 2010 @06:47AM (#2051964)
I'm not sure anybody is implying it's evil to point it out. imho, it's not evil, just a little sad to accept things as they are and 'deal with it'.
Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by sp332 on Thursday December 30, 2010 @12:08AM (#2051292)
He didn't say that he was dating her because she was useful, or whatever. He didn't say "get a hot SO, it'll help you network", he said "If you have a hot SO, ask them to help you network." I think that's not bad.
Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by brandnewlow on Thursday December 30, 2010 @01:51AM (#2051539)
I don't even think he was saying that. I thought it was more: If you have a hot SO, it will help you network.
Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by sjtgraham on Wednesday December 29, 2010 @11:54PM (#2051262)
She wasn't a developer of any description and as a matter of fact doesn't even work in tech. She knew of Ruby on Rails because as someone she was dating, she wanted to know what made me tick.
Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by 3pt14159 on Thursday December 30, 2010 @12:12AM (#2051305)
That is even worse. She didn't even know rails and she was the life of the party.

It's great to have SOs that try to dig what you are into (mine does, and after a while started writing up HTML and CSS for side cash; starting to get into JavaScript too), but honestly dude writing about using hot girls that barely know what rails is to get contacts at tech events certainly doesn't make us look like upstanding gentlemen. It makes it look like we look towards girls as if they are objects, rather than interesting people. The whole theme of putting yourself on a level playing ground with super rich guys because they just can't buy a smart hot girl is offsetting too.

But whatever, my original comments downvoted anyways, so I'm probably wrong and just being too touchy.

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by sjtgraham on Thursday December 30, 2010 @12:23AM (#2051331)
You make a lot of assumptions. Who is to say this was per se a tech event? It actually wasn't, it was the birthday celebrations of a major record company.

The people whom I spoke with were from a large advertising agency that use Rails developers internally. I don't see any reason to see why she shouldn't be the life and soul of a party, she is a very beautiful and very smart woman, an intoxicating combination!

I seem to have touched a nerve with you re this post. I apologise, I did not mean to cause any offence.

S

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by 3pt14159 on Thursday December 30, 2010 @12:55PM (#2052953)
Yeah, I shouldn't have worded my previous two comments as I did, they were too inflammatory so I apologize for that.

I had just found out a day or two ago that a family member was severely discriminated against at work (it's all good though, she resolved it herself before telling us. When you work in tech you can often "prove" yourself right, which she did), so you're right about the touching a nerve thing.

Anyways, cheers! I know you meant no offense.

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by brandnewlow on Thursday December 30, 2010 @03:22AM (#2051717)
Don't let the haters win! All you were doing is pointing out some facts:

1. Woman are crazy discerning about the men they hang around. 2. Smart men recognize this. 3. Therefore, if you see a high-value woman identifying a man as someone she thinks is worth her time, and you know she is crazy discerning about who she hangs out with, it's a safe bet that person is worth your time.

Re:The (Real) Hot Girl Effect and Networking by haploid on Thursday December 30, 2010 @11:04AM (#2052518)
This is very dubious. Women are only more "discerning" about men insofar as mate preferences go. If I were at a networking event or party, and I was seeking out men who offered good reproductive fitness potential, then examining the "hotness" of their companionship would be a good way to go.

However, I don't form business relationships based on reproductive fitness. Most people interested in building a successful enterprise don't, either.

I will allow exceptions for sperm banks and male escort services, though.