‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life’

Re:‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whol... by Zelphyr on Thursday November 29, 2018 @03:33PM (#18563700)

This is becoming a common thread these days; assuming the male is the aggressor. I've heard stories of girlfriends beating their boyfriend so bad as to have him visibly bleeding, yet when the he calls 911, he is the one that gets arrested with the police saying something along the lines of, "Yeah, there's no way a little girl like that beat you up."

I would venture to guess that the majority of domestic violence is male against female, but we have to start recognizing and allowing for the fact that it happens the other way around more often than we might be willing to think.

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Re:‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whol... by balls187 on Thursday November 29, 2018 @05:08PM (#18564582)

Only 15% of men who are abused ever report it.

There is also more to DV than just physical violence.

https://www.thehotline.org/is-this-abuse/abuse-defined/

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Re:‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whol... by dexen on Thursday November 29, 2018 @03:57PM (#18563932)

The police doesn't have much of discretion on the subject according to common training material. Consider the following points selected from Stop Violence Against Women website[1]:

  To determine the predominant aggressor, police must consider:
    The seriousness of injuries received by each party
    The height and weight of the parties
    Which party has the potential to seriously injure the other party
    Orders for protection that have been filed by a party
    Whether a party has a fearful demeanor
    Whether a party has a controlling demeanor

-- [1] http://www.stopvaw.org/determining_the_predominant_aggressor

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Re:‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whol... by placeholderNam on Friday November 30, 2018 @12:30AM (#18566949)

I can't find the source right now, but I've read the male victims of DV are more likely to be arrested themselves when the call the police on the female perpetrator.

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Re:‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whol... by sheepmullet on Thursday November 29, 2018 @05:05PM (#18564552)

> I would venture to guess that the majority of domestic violence is male against female

Why?

The data suggests it’s close to 50-50.

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Re:‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whol... by Zelphyr on Thursday November 29, 2018 @05:08PM (#18564577)

Really? Wow. I didn't realize that. Are there good sources for this kind of information you can refer me to?

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Re:‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whol... by balls187 on Thursday November 29, 2018 @05:17PM (#18564656)

"Nearly half of all women and men in the United States have experienced psychological aggression by an intimate partner in their lifetime (48.4% and 48.8%, respectively)."

More numbers here:

https://www.thehotline.org/resources/statistics/

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Re:‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whol... by tomp on Thursday November 29, 2018 @07:57PM (#18565691)

Abusers are about equally men and women. A surprisingly large percentage of those partners are mutually abusive (I forgot if it's more like 25% or more like 50% but both are high IMO). Men hurt women more because men are, duh, stronger.

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Re:‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whol... by balls187 on Thursday November 29, 2018 @09:56PM (#18566252)

In an abusive relationship, there is always a dominant abuser.

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Re:‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whol... by derangedHorse on Friday November 30, 2018 @10:22PM (#18574894)

In Kevin Hart's audiobook he talks about how his ex-wife beat him until he was visibly damaged. When he called the cops the first thing they did was ask his ex-wife "Is everything ok?" Keep in mind, Kevin was the one who called the cops!

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Re:‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whol... by wallace_f on Thursday November 29, 2018 @04:57PM (#18564487)

Apparently abusive mothers are more common than abusive fathers: https://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/parenting/kids/why-arent-w...

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