I really want to believe there's something better. But I think the real choice is between "local bank" -- shitty website, hard-to-use ATMs that require putting checks in envelopes, bad hours OR a big national bank, where you're a number, but the software is good, there are branches everywhere, they have a good mobile app/good ATMs, etc.
My personal philosophy has become, "I'm ok being a number because I'm pretty average personally, but I want a local bank for business banking." It's worked so far.
My relatively large regional credit union has all the advantages you list for a big bank except branches everywhere when traveling, especially good ATMs and mobile app. And doesn't have the “your just a number” problem.
Okay, so pick any other bank which serves the entire community — whether it's a small credit union, a smaller regional bank, or a larger one which isn't BofA (I use TD Bank). The service will still be worlds better and they won't periodically require massive fraud prosecutions. It has nothing to do with the customers and everything to do with the corporate culture.
I agree that the culture at Wells Fargo appears to have been one of rapacious greed. What I do not understand is how the previous CEO and his underling (the woman who retired) were not hauled before a judge on a range of criminal charges. Maybe CFPB does not have prosecuting power, but surely they can refer to DoJ for prosecution?
Not to say that Wells Fargo should not provide better service, but I just want to point out that these are two different types of banks.
I had a similar experience with Bank of America. The person who was supposed to help me was rude, untrained, and actually caused a lot of problems without addressing my original request (close my account); I later got help from a higher-up (actually trained) who did provide a modicum of service. I had a much better experience at a Credit Union.