Is it not also a choice when (or whether) to have children? I put off having any until I was well established, to make sure that I could provide for them without the kinds of tradeoffs we're talking about. It's amazing what a difference it makes to defer major spending - houses, kids, etc. - until you're further up the salary curve.
> who doesn't aspire to that for their children?
We can all aspire for many things, but we all have to make choices - where to live, who/when to marry, which job to take, which house or car to buy, which trip to take, which money to invest where, etc. Few of us get to have everything we aspire to, for ourselves or our kids. If safe schools are a priority, as I agree they should be, maybe some of those other choices need to be made differently. It's all about priorities.
I had this perspective as well (in my 20s), until I had children. I supposed everything can theoretically be considered a want rather than a need. But how many people are really comfortable having roommates live with your family and children?
As for living in "the crappiest place", I lived in a pretty sketchy place during my childhood. We had metal detectors in our high school in Brooklyn. Reference: https://www.propublica.org/article/nyc-school-children-face-... You can consider wanting to go to a safe school a want (vs a need), but who doesn't aspire to that for their children?