However, the absence of those can make you sad and bitter.

I work at a company with rock solid health, vision, and dental benefits, very good working hours, and I can't wait to get out.

It's full of married employees with children that hope to retire here. It is an excellent place for pregnant women, but no good if you're young or have any kind of ambition.

It's not an either/or. Ideally, I prefer the both/and.

Ha, touché. I was coming from the assumption that those things are a baseline that you'll get at most salaried programming jobs, but you're right for calling out that assumption.

The hilarity of maturing. At 19, pizza, soda and video games after work were sexy. At 31, a stable retirement plan is what gets me revved up.