When non-technical people ask what I do, I say, "I write software."

It's been the most well-received title I've found. "Software Developer" is too technical and euphemistic, and "Programmer" is a little nebulous, and also pretty technical. Most people don't necessarily know what a "program" is.

I think that hearing "I write X" is also a more accessible conversation starter since you aren't saying who you are, but what you do.