Also, how do you see these shares? As a commitement? How much of your time would you spend on each? They had the idea so they deserve a premium but if you will spend just as much time as them on it, that premium is all that separates you from them.
Commitement matters. As important as ideas are, without commitement and execution, they are nothing.
In most innocent sense it doesn't make sense why you would give up 40% for their 20%. Not that this means much without knowing any detail about what level each startup is in.
Ask yourself if their company is worth twice yours right now. You would know better.
Do a merger and figure out the split based on what each of your cofounder brings to the table. This makes more sense if your business and theirs compliment each other and are both in the startup phase.
Right now I sense that you are confused about what exactly you want out of this. If you are looking for a cofounder, a merger makes much more sense than equity swap which doesn't get you a cofounder.
Is this a fair deal?