"It's a bit faster, there are some other minor obscure improvements, and if you just ignore all of the crappy new stuff it's not a big deal!"

If boot times are a big issue for you, then I get it. For me, they aren't, so I'm inclined to pass on the update. Perhaps it would work great with a Windows Phone or Surface (I'm tempted to try those at some point, so if anybody would like to share their experiences with theirs...), but it doesn't seem like it was designed for a desktop. So why should I put it on my desktop?

It really isn't a big deal, because you're not being forced to use the Metro apps. You can populate the start menu with regular application shortcuts and you're on your way.

Also the skydrive + settings sync is really nice. Whenever I install on a new device, everything's set up on first boot.

Lots of other features that don't make headlines but are genuinely useful: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Features_new_to_Windows_8

OK, then why is it a "clear upgrade"?

I liked this workflow better when it was called DOS.

Knock it all you want, but it's obvious that people like working like this. OS X has Spotligh/Alfred, Linux has Gnome DO etc, it's basically on every OS.