> I used to be the empathetic good guy, but since the transition, my income has sky rocketed, I feel less pressure and my health has improved.

Perhaps I'm extrapolating to the great extreme, but seeing this comment(especially the health part) I think what you used to be wasn't empahtetic good guy but rather a general good guy who can't say no. If this assessment is correct I think you've 'turned'(to your own diction) into not an asshole, but a self-assertive guy who can say no. That's somewhat different from being an asshole.

Though it may seem like an assholery, it generally is not.