Sure, there are bad lawyers like there are bad examples of anything else you care to name. It sucks that you've had a bad time of it, divorce court can't be fun.
But the fact that every interaction you've had seems negative - with your own lawyers, opposing lawyers, judges and even bailiffs (who are essentially non-legal admin/security staff) reveals a pattern. Eventually you have to ask: Is the whole world crazy, or just me?
Disclosure: I am a lawyer. I've had very difficult clients in the past. I generally get along well with clients, opposing counsel and even the opposing clients (to the extent we interact).
Most bar associations operate a referral service that weeds out lawyers with bad histories. You pay the bar ~$100 and they give you the contact info for the next lawyer in the queue who practices in the field you need.
At least this way you can be sure of getting a lawyer who does not have a history of screwing over any clients badly enough to get a complaint filed rather than a lawyer who did not screw over the one client who happens to be your friend.
That is good advice though ^_^
If you have had the fortune of having a lawyer do you well, good for you. I have never once experienced this. I have many examples to draw from.
EDIT: well well well, you're actually a lawyer. No wonder your bias.
Many examples:
* Didn't read my filings prior to court
* Forgot our conversations, and misrepresented my statements
* charged thousands, never showed up in court
* threatening me
* accusing me of threatening them (example cited)
* charging many thousands of dollars for retainer, while never doing any hours of work aside from a 30-minute phone call
* charging me telling me they could achieve a certain outcome, then telling me that there was nothing they could do and it was out of their control.
Yeah - fuck that.